Here's the thing: I completely agree with you.
I also wish I could just do stupid fucking jokes again. Honestly, I think I'm better at them than I am as a contributor to Some News or shrieking about voter fraud. As important as that topic is to me (very, please go to Let America Vote to learn how you can help), I'd much rather it be covered by someone smarter than me while I focus on what I'm better at (which would be, gun to my head, 1,500 words of dialog-driven nonsense starring a fictionalized version of myself who can't spell and is also a war criminal).
And is that a surprise to you? Haven't you followed me? Don't you think I'd rather be talking about Spider-Man and my stupid, stupid dick? I would!
I don't want to cover Hillary Rodham Clinton substantively; I want to make jokes like "The 'Rodham' in her name is short for "'Rodney Hampton.'" That's as political as I'd like to be, but the realities of our world make it sort of impossible to stay out of politics, so I bought her friggin' book instead. A few years ago, you could ask me about comics. Today I'm ready to host a boring conference on What Happened, Giant Of The Senate, The Devil's Bargain, and whatever that piece of shit Ben Sasse called his piece-of-shit book. And I hate that about me.
You have to understand something. When we accidentally gave a flailing, possum-faced, rotting egg the most important job in the world, the people at Cracked didn't say, "Aha! Finally an opportunity for us to pivot away from nonfiction comedic list articles and strange personality-driven columns to focus on our true love: a thoroughly researched topical news show about Nazis, Antifa, the works of Jean Paul Sartre, and the troubling ways those three things intercept in our increasingly terrifying world. Haw!" I don't want to do that. None of us want to do that. We want to walk around the office pronouncing it "Jean Paul Star Trek" and then write videos about a man who got confused and had sex with a pumpkin at an adult pumpkin-carving party, which isn't even a thing that exists.