When persuasion doesn’t work, try baffling incompetence.
It's OK if a movie just sucks.
Have you heard the good/bad/mixed news?
The cops should simply follow the trails of honey to the villain’s hideouts. Case closed.
To those about to beef: We salute you.
Featuring very special guest JESSE THORN!
Hindsight is the year 2020.
Yo, Hollywood, audiences remember what happened in the last movie. Ya know?
It's important Cracked announcement time, folks.
An accurate movie about Stan's life would end up pretty sordid.
Wow, more like Hollyweird (EXTREMELY ORIGINAL JOKE COPYRIGHT CRACKED DOT COM 2020)
Think all entertainment exists because of algorithms? Think again.
Not like this Hollywood. Not like this.
You’re too old for your teachers to confiscate it.
The timing couldn't be better for a Monopoly return.
We see what you did there.
Always be prepared to lowball victims.
Hope you cashed out!
