#2. The Non-Lethal Bullet That Attacks All the Senses
So, as we just mentioned, non-lethal weapons are kind of a Catch-22. Nobody likes the thought of little kids getting shocked/gassed/pain rayed because they got caught shoplifting a candy bar. But when these weapons are being used as an alternative to actual bullets, they're downright merciful. That's why the market for non-lethal weapons is exploding, and why they are in fact trying to find ways to make them safer.
"What if we added salt?"
Because all non-lethal weapons right now have their Achilles' heels: Plastic bullets can be fatal, Tasers can be dangerous and pepper sprays are only good when your target is too close for comfort.
Clearly the answer is to combine all of those into one thing.
The Insane Upgrade
It's a non-lethal bullet called ShockRound, which not only sounds like a particularly grating Indiana Jones sidekick, but also has the nerve-wrecking factor to match. The tiny little projectile manages to attack three of your five senses in one mind-numbing assault. First, it hits you much like an ordinary rubber bullet. Then, it opens and shoots compressed gas at you. While throwing a sonic boom at you. While blinding you.
Because there's no such thing as overkill with a non-lethal weapon.
Seriously. All that's missing is a boot-on-a-spring that shoots out and kicks you in the nuts, and chances are they're going to add that to the 2.0 version.
Said payload is a combination of compressed air and chemicals, custom designed to overwhelm the human senses in a way that totally takes your mind off fighting. In a fraction of an instant, it will create a dazzling flash to blind you, a loud woomph! noise to disorient your hearing and, of course, a mini-explosion of pressurized air that blasts your body with concussive force. This creates a sensation not unlike being shot with a beanbag and a stun grenade at the same time.
We smell a new successor to paintball!
But what if you enjoy being crowd controlled with super stun-bullets shot from realistic-looking sidearms, but prefer more exotic submission methods than mere sensory attacks? Not to worry -- the good people at SmartRound are working on many other types of "fuck you" bullets, which may include "irritant sprays," "expanding gels" and even "explosives."
Yes, bullets with irritant sprays and expanding gels. The future is here, ladies and gentlemen, you just need to start a riot to see it.
#1. Tiny Little Flying Killer Toy Robots
It probably comes as no surprise to you that Unmanned Aerial Vehicles (UAVs) have been military hot property for years now -- you've probably seen them on the news every time one of them kills a terrorist and a dozen innocent bystanders to boot. Even our state-of-the-art assassination technology lacks the intricate maneuverability to reach the bad guy hiding in the Puppy Hospital without compromising all the puppies.
"Adorability does not compute."
The Insane Upgrade
The army agrees that that shit just won't do, and for future puppy-saving purposes has developed the Autonomous Quadrotor UAV:
Look at that thing go! In just that short demonstration clip, that tiny four-rotored guy flits through tiny window-sized spaces like it ain't no thing, perches on walls and hovers like nobody's business. It's like one of those tiny Michael Bay comic relief Transformers, except it's real and doesn't speak with a wacky accent.
What it does do is as remarkable as it is creepy: It can fly in formation, maneuver safely in tight, enclosed spaces and avoid every obstacle on the way as it sneaks up on the bad guy ... then perch calmly on his shoulder and detonate a localized but lethal explosion right on his ass. Then, as all the grateful puppies gather around it, the Autonomous Quadrotor UAV scoffs at you for not having faith in its explosive abilities.
To prove its sophistication and precision, here is a squad of them playing the James Bond theme on musical instruments.
Oh, look at that. The world has finally gone insane.
If you're pressed for time and just looking for a quick fix, then check out 5 Reasons Ol Dirty Bastard's Biopic Must be a Superhero Film.
And stop by LinkSTORM to see how to build your awesome Cyborg Fist.
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