The 7 Most Stupidly Overpowered Hunting Weapons
Hunting: It is an age-old dance. It is a sacred covenant between the predator and the prey ... and the guy bristling with a half-dozen giant cannons and sporting only the most advanced cloaking technology. Sure, it's not "fair" to the animal, and sure there's no "sport" in it, and sure it makes you "kind of a dick," but answer us this: If deer like living so much, why didn't they invent high explosives, huh? If that logic made sense, well then, buddy, have we got some stupidly overpowered hunting gadgets for you:
#7.
.577 Tyrannosaur Rounds
The .577 Tyrannosaur round is, well, let's just say they don't name something "the T-Rex" because of its subtly engineered grace:
The one on the left is the T-Rex; the fourth is an ordinary shotgun round
It's a bullet so large that you can't actually use it. Here's a clip of people trying to fire it:
About the fifth time a loaded rifle goes hurtling out of a man's hands and careening around a roomful of people, you get the feeling this might not be entirely safe.
"Haha! We are a danger to ourselves and those around us!"
But hey, it's still a fine weapon: After all, the problem isn't that it doesn't kill what you're shooting at, just that it quite possibly kills you and all of your friends in the process. It's kind of the same process as a honeybee leaving its stinger -- just replace the stinger with high explosives and the honeybee with four drunken idiots.
The round was originally designed to stop the headlong charges of big game, but we'll let this review speak to its effectiveness there: "It is not at all clear that [the T-Rex Round] will kill an elephant or a buffalo or a hippo any better than a well placed hit from a 470, and, of course, it will not do anything with a badly placed hit except annoy the recipient."
So basically, the Tyrannosaur round is only for dipshits who need to overcompensate for something more than they need working arms to shield their faces from angry bears, or else it's for expert hunters who have become so jaded by their excessive prowess that they feel the need to handicap themselves. Possibly literally.
"These unbroken hands are an unfair advantage."
#6.
Shadow Shield
The Shadow Shield is a new kind of blind -- a camouflaged shelter that allows hunters to get close enough to their targets to fire shots. But the Shadow Shield takes that concept a bit further, in that it is to game what the Predator's cloaking device was to Arnold Schwarzenegger:
What is that? Something nailed to the tree?
Oh, it's an invisible man with a gun. Really, dude? I'm a fucking deer.
The Shadow Shield is a brilliantly simple idea: It's just a reflective folding wall, with a small slit to place a gun through. You can't see your own reflection while looking at it, because it's angled slightly forward. If you were to get close enough, you would see that it's just a mirror, and then you'd see a gun barrel pointing at your head, and then you'd probably see whatever God deer are worshiping these days. Odin, maybe?
Is that an invisible 50s-era sci-fi robot?
Nope: Just a dude masturbating. Come on, he is. It's just one of those things you intrinsically know.
So hurry on out and buy yourself a Shadow Shield! Look, you saw for yourself: No downside! Even if you move, all the animals will see is a slightly rustling bush. And that's all your hunter friends will see, too. Just a tantalizing, rustling bush ...
#5.
The Net Gun
We'll let the website text introduce you to the Super Talon Net Gun: "Need an alternative to darts? Get a net gun. Need to rescue a bird that got entangled? Grab a net gun. Have a pet that always thinks you're trying to play tag with it and darts every time you get close? Grab a net gun."
That's right: From hunting to humanitarian missions to just getting your dog to hate you, nothing does it better than a cartoonish net-firing hand-cannon. Don't worry -- it doesn't require any special licenses or permits to operate, because it's technically classified as a "tool" instead of a "firearm" -- and you will be too, once you deploy something out of a Batman villain's arsenal just to bag a squirrel. It comes with a hefty $900 price tag, but for the arch nemesis on a budget, you can always just build one yourself.
Look, you're a hunter -- we all know that the logical evolution of this little hobby is going to terminate with you hunting the ultimate game: man. And Super Talon has got your back on that: The net gun's also meant for people! Law enforcement agencies purportedly use it "for riot control" so the subjects "are detained but not harmed," although safe money says it's really "for shits and giggles" because the subjects "are too drunk to remember you fired a net at the bar."
#4.
Barnes Varmint Grenade
The Barnes Varmint Grenade isn't actually a grenade, just a precisely engineered hollow-point bullet. It comes in two sizes: Regular ...
And Insecure:
You've probably at least heard of hollow-points before, so you know they're somehow more deadly than regular bullets. But those of you who aren't "gun people" need to see it in action to appreciate just how ridiculously overpowered it is:
Yes, those were prairie dogs, and yes, they were exploding into vapor.
The Varmint Grenade was designed by Barnes using "military-grade technology" to ensure that larger animals can be killed without damaging their valuable pelts, because the bullets expand so rapidly on impact that they don't actually punch through the other side of a larger animal. Small entrance hole on one side, nonexistent exit hole on the other side, bag of nice soft fur filled with animal soup inside. We should mention at this point that hollow-point bullets were actually banned for use in war by the Hague Convention, which predated the Geneva Conventions, because of their "inhumanity" ... so it's a good thing you're not usin' 'em on humanity, ain't it?! Yee-haw! Let's commitin' war-crimes agin' opossums!
This review is stupid beyond comparison, it's obvious the writer is an indoctrinated leftist and knows next to nothing about hunting and guns. First:
Reply1. The .577 T-Rex rounds can be used easily. The individuals in the video were just inexperienced with that type of recoil, but an experienced hunter can use it easily.
2. The constant jokes about "insecurity" and "rednecks" are more cliche and effeminately whiny than funny. Plus it's a complete double standard. There's nothing more "insecure" about wanting to own a large or powerful gun, than there is in wanting to own the world's biggest comic book or video game collection. And there's not really any difference in making fun of "gun enthusiasts" than there is in making fun of the comic book guy for being a "nerd". Nope the guy (or girl I'm hoping) who's insecure is the idiot who has nothing better to do with his time than take pot shots at other people because he doesn't happen to like their hobby.
3. The "Varmint Grenade" is actually much more humane than standard ammo. It kills the animals instantly, while standard ammo can end up leaving the animal to slowly bleed to death in pain. It also is better for the ecosystem, since the small chunks of flesh are easier to be eaten up by vultures or other animals, while if an entire carcass is left there it can end up rotting and going to waste. And if the guy is seriously referencing the quasi-Marxist Hague Convention as a credible source on what's "humane" and what's not, then he's too far gone from leftist indoctrination to be worth saving. This just shows how much liberals value emotion over truth - they want to ban the varment grenade because "Oh! The poor wittle animal exploded! That's sooo brutal!" even though in REALITY it's actually LESS brutal to the animal.
Libs seriously need to quit sipping lattes and playing Dungeons and Dragons, and get off their ass and actually learn to shoot a gun before making themselves look ignorant - or at very least they should come up with real insults, stead of making themselves sound effeminate to the point that liberal "men" end up sounding more like a mom talking down to her rowdy son. It's embarrassing.
As obnoxious as this is put this is correct. The hauge convention banned soft points (not hollow points, IIRC). Ironically, the old cast lead bullets being used up till that time were doing more damage to the people then the new fangled soft point copper jacketed bullets.
Also, the regular and insecure versions, you compared a bullet to a loaded cartridge. Funny, but for the wrong reasons.
Also, since it has yet to be noted punt sounds a lot like cunt.
Hey ANTIGUNFAGS, it's not that there are too many animals, there are too many people! the are 6 billion of us, and WE are the ones who took most of their space! and unlike animals, we aren't contributing a thing to the planet, however, I do agree with you that getting shot is more humane (why is humane a good word? humans arent very good at being nice to others that look different), but I disagree with you that there are too many animals, we're doung the same thing, the European settlers did to the Naive Americans! (sorry if I was too rude, I'm just very temperamental about this things)
Replylol
The net guns are used by a lot of police agencies in the Far East, but they use a much larger model that looks like a massive sawed-off.
Replywow how is a rifle that can only even hold on round, and only even fire one round at a time a danger after it has already been fired? After they pull the trigger it's no more dangerous than a huge broomstick falling. Cry about it. Also, hunting is the humane way of killing some of these animals, all of the citizens who want more roads, a lawn, a new car or a brand new home are the ones killing these animals. on my way home from hunting the other day I saw 4 mangled deer carcasses on the road and blood everywhere after not seeing anything while actually hunting. We have to control the population because there is no f*****g place for them to go now, die quickly by big bullets or ripped in half bleeding to death or suffocating slowly from broken ribs from getting hit by your car. Hunting is more humane than what they do to the cattle we eat and better for you.
ReplyHey ANTIGUNFAGS, it's not that there are too many animals, there are too many people! the are 6 billion of us, and WE are the ones who took most of their space! and unlike animals, we aren't contributing a thing to the planet, however, I do agree with you that getting shot is more humane (why is humane a good word? humans arent very good at being nice to others that look different), but I disagree with you that there are too many animals, we're doung the same thing, the European settlers did to the Naitve Americans! (sorry if I was too rude, I'm just very temperamental about these things)
I believe there is a very simple way of ending this arguement on hunting, in order to get a hunting license with a gun, you should have to kill one animal you would wish to hunt with a bowie knife and a pointy stick. if you do this, you can upgrade to a better weapon until you max out onto these weapons. video games can teach us all
Reply Hide All See All 3 RepliesDon't bother with a pointy stick.Any decent (true) bowie knife will help you do the job fine. Or a throwing hatchet.
I agree, although that might get a little tricky when hunting ducks...
A pointy stick?...geryk6 your f*****g idiot
hahahahahahaha loving the comments. this artical is so retarted.
Reply Hide All See All 5 Replies#7) the .577 trex is for hunting dangerous game to where it is either you live or the deadly charging beast. and it is not as powerful as the 50 bmg. it is 3000ftlbs weaker.
#6)the shadow shield imho is less effective than a guillie suit.
#5)the net gun was not designed for hunting but rather for humanly capturing and relocating or tagging animals
#4)varmint granade is like it said to kill larger animals without destroying their pelt. it is effective on prarie dogs because it quickly and humanly kills them. they are a major problem to both other animals and humans.
#3)whats the difference between that and how they kill the chickens you get at Mcdonalds? nothing. pop off with the head. i dont think the bird will be able to tell the diference
#2)if you had a major problem with wild hogs at you home would you want to sit outside all day to get them?
#1)the punt gun helped people sustain their way of life. they depended on killing ducks and this was before kfc was invented to make dinner so easy for them and the rest of their community.
b***h.
#7 its a round that forces the gun out of your hand, so if its kill or be killed, why would you risk losing your gun? Kinda defeats the purpose they claim that its to help them hunt.
#2 Thats just lazy,i don't care how you put it, you want to slaughter tons of hogs, sit outside and do it, or hell, hire someone, just do not give the robots an easier way to rise up on us
Just because something's easy doesn't make it right OR humane. I don't give a s**t what you say, if we won't authorize the use of a weapon on ourselves (and we humans do appear to have a serious hard-on for murder), then I consider it an inhumane thing to use against an animal.
Look at this man's screen name, and the fact that every third word in his comment is misspelled. He is either an astoundingly talented troll or he is Larry, the Cable Guy,
And I end my comment about someone's inability to type with a comma instead of a period. Goodnight everybody!
Bigman here is clearly a member of the IRA and quite possibly an idiot. It's not WHAT he said...but how he said it. And yes, looking at his name and listening to what he said and how he said it kind of paints a really good picture of a pretty stupid person who just so happens to know his stuff about guns and hunting. He makes reasonable points but let's get real. People are lazy and don't care about true efficiency. With the technology we have, if you depend on a food source as a way of life we can skip the hunting part entirely and do everything via machines and labs. Soon, there will be enough synthetic proteins and nutrients we won't need real food. I'd rather have real food though. And yeah, so would other people. But hunters using far more than they need are more like cowards. I don't see Rhinocerous with hunting rifles as weapons.
How about learning to be stealthy and developing skills so you can sneak up on prey rather than using the shield? That's hunting. Hunting is a personal test. Or it's supposed to be. When people go hunting but are guaranteed to win- they're not hunting. They're collecting. There's a difference.
Seriously, why name yourself ghettoblaster if you're going to act like a little b***hass p***y-b***hface?
ReplySeriously, why name yourself ghettoblaster if you're going to act like a little b***hass p***y-b***hface?
ReplyITT: People who have replaced their penis's with gun barrels that get mad when you call them on it.
Reply Hide All See All 5 RepliesGuns make us weak and stupid, the majority if people who hunt do it only for the satisfaction of killing another creature, if meat was the real concern they would spend a single days pay on meat, instead of the thousands of dollars in gear and days of work it takes to hunt the way they like. It's about power.
Way to succ*mb to the age-old trap of ridiculously generalizing everyone who doesn't share your personal feelings. By using your logic, the vast majority of people who whine about hunters are emo man-babies who need to cry over something to get an erection.
I share a slight, I mean very slight, version of your views. My hunting is mostly confined to boar. Everyone I know uses high-powered semi-automatic rifles and hide in trees, which I see as just unsporting. Composite bow and bowie knife is all I need. But I'll be damned if I don't carry enough firepower with me to fell a small army of Eurasian hog demons just in case.
No. In case you didn't know,some people hunt rather than buy their meat for a reason. And it's NOT power. It's called pride.Knowing you have the capability to provide for yourself and likely others.Knowing you EARNED that meat, rather than buying the meat the easy way.
Ghettoblaster7 your f*****g idoit and I dont even wont to waste by breath arguing with one who know nothing about hunting. Why dont you go hunt for porn and play with your dick.
YEAH! YOU ARE A f*****g POES
They use some of these for monster hunting. Like Rathalos and etc :P
Reply Hide All See All 3 Replies"
The one on the left is the T-Rex; the fourth is an ordinary shotgun round
there isnt a single shot gun round in there. who else noticed that?
Proper monster hunting is actually conducted with the .950 JDJ rifle. Which is pretty much a 20mm Vulcan cannon shell necked-up to accept a half pound solid bronze 25mm bullet. And you guys thought the s**t in this article was bad. Cracked really dropped the ball on their "ridiculously over-powered destructive devices" research.
(response to dylan phillips) Actually,that shell on the far right is a shotgun shell.It's made of brass rather than the red plastic you usually associate with shotgun shells.Brass cases were used before plastics were invented.
Hey, i Know the Guillotine blades exist. they sell them here in my town. Sure, it's Wyoming, And they outlawed internet hunting, (THank God!) but it all comes down to this: the whole point of guns is that they are used for self-defense, warfare, and hunting, minus the minor technicality of criminal usage.
ReplyYou realize that its illegal (in all the states I know of) to hunt with a NON hollow point or other type of expanding bullet right? Hollow points were banned in the Geneva Convention because they were more lethal than FMJ and the point was to simply injure an enemy soldier rather than kill him. The point of hunting is to KILL what you were hunting thus, use a hollow point or expanding bullet. In the case of varmints most of the time the purpose is to kill a nuisance on a farm rather than actually harvest anything from the animal so vaporizing them fills this need perfectly. I also like how you differentiated between "regular" which is just a bullet that wouldn't work if you inserted it into a firearm and pulled the trigger and "insecure" the bullet now actually inserted into a casing with gunpowder and a primer otherwise known as a functioning cartridge. I could go on for awhile but this is most likely a waste of time, ignorance just really gets to me sometimes.
Reply Hide All See All 4 RepliesI can't really tell what you're trying to say, but I think that's just because you cannot write well. Maybe if you spent less time loading your gun to kill prairie dogs(by the way, why kill Prairie dogs? are they in your cabbage patch or something?) and more time exploring ideas, you wouldn't regard yourself as the bright light of knowledge on cracked.
I understood him just fine. You seem to be the one with the inabilities.
I find it hilarious that someone named ghettoblaster is trying to be a sophisticated anti-gun activist.
You kill prairie dogs because they destroy crops and pretty much make the land impossible to safely traverse. When you try to drive across your field to go on a nice, peaceful fishing trip and snap your axle in a burrow, you'll understand. Also, isn't it significantly more humane to vaporize the little buggers instantly instead of hit them with an underpowered cartridge that would give them a few seconds to experience exactly how painful death by gunshot is? I'm strongly against harming creatures that pose no threat to me. But if my only choice is kill them humanely or watch as my family's livelihood turns into a sinkhole... well, c'mon.
You would rather the prairie dog be mearly wounded? To slowly suffer and die a painfull death? Or the McDonalds hamburger you would be eating in a few months steps in the prairie dog hole, breaks its leg, and is found as a pile of dead veal a few days later? This article was as funny for how much the auther doesn't know / understand as it was for anything else.
Reply Hide All See All 4 RepliesAnd yes, I know in #3 he states "We don't mean to come off as anti-hunting here..." Really? Waits till second page of article and uses royal "we". Now who's compensating?
two problems with that:
1) most of these were NOT invented with the intention of putting a creature out of its misery
2) punt guns exist so any defense of this article is irrelevant
Not the royal "we". Article is attributed to multiple people. Just the regular "we".
Hunting with punt guns has been outlawed for a good while. You cannot hold our generation responsible for what a bunch of greedy dicks did a hundred years ago. That would, in fact, make you an even bigger dick. Dick.
Don't underestimate ducks. Any less firepower and they'll deflect it and kill you with that bullet.
ReplyDucks fly together
SO DOES IDIOTS! POESHAAR
That round isn't the .577 T.Rex. It is the Weatherby .700 Nitro Express. The .577 is just slightly bigger than a .50 cal. If fact it it is exactly .077 inches bigger. And it is not used as a primary hunting round. It is used by dangerous game guides to put down injured animals.
ReplyWeatherby .700 Nitro Express? LOL FAIL, on many, many levels. For 1, Weatherby NEVER has made a rimmed cartridge...as Weatherby does not produce single shot or double barrel rifles which those are made for. The .577 T-rex is MUCH larger then a .50 cal in terms of delivered power. A couple hundreths of an inch makes a huge difference. That is like saying a .416 bullet is just slightly bigger then a .308 bullet.
More fail - PH's (professional hunters, they're not called guides) don't use 600 or 700 NE rifles, because they are generally not very wealthy men. Those rifles cost 250-500k to build and usually several years wait. Most PH's, IF they use a double rifle, use the .470 NE. However a majority of PH's who guide for dangerous game use the 458 Win Mag or 416 Rigby due to lower cost of ammo (700 NE runs around 50$ or more per shot) lower cost of rifles, and availability of ammo. Not sure if you've been to Africa, but its not exactly like running down to Wal-Mart when you're out of milk. So yes, it IS used as a primary hunting weapon by rich people who have more money then they know what to do with. The ONLY reason the 700 was built, was because Holland and Holland declared they had built the "last" 600 NE and would not build anymore. Someone waived enough money in their face because HE wanted the biggest gun around, so they created the 700 NE. Coincidentally, they ended up doing another run of 600's about a decade later due to demand.
I have fired an old .8 gauge double barrel. (the smaller the gauge the bigger the shotgun) I meant to only fire one barrel but the mechanism was worn out and both went off at the same time. I am proud to say I didn't drop the gun, though I did spend 3 min staggering around screaming as I was convinced the gun had blown up, the recoil and muzzle blast was seriously that bad.
ReplyOk this article is very sad it shows me that rednecks have way to much time on there hands.
ReplyOf course they do. They couldn't get jobs as functioning members of society, so they live in the woods and congratulate each other with coyote pelts.
Ah. So now we're going with the ignorance-based insults. Oh, bravo, gentlemen. Your originality and wit truly astounds us "rednecks". Next you'll say all "hillbillies" (since PC doesn't apply to Appalachian Americans) have no teeth and can't read. You know, for those of the liberal persuasion you truly do seem to be some annoying, ignorant, prejudiced dicks. I feel sorry for you, I really do. At least we have the ability to flourish in whatever situation we should find ourselves in. Ten bucks says you'd cry hysterically for three weeks and then die of starvation if one day your local retail infrastructure wasn't there anymore. A country boy can survive, you sickening sycophants.
All right, you anti-gun pussies/peta members, I will take your challenge. I WILL KNIFE THE DEER.
Reply Hide All See All 5 RepliesI WILL RIP Off ITS HEAD, s**t DOWN ITS THROAT AND FEED IT TO A HOBO.
hunt a boar with a knife and a rope. :D
there's a difference between using a conventional rifle and using something that will turn it into f**king Jell-O.
Nem0: Great idea!
KayneArcheron: I dont think knives do that
Using a knife is far more manly than using a rifle...
"Ahhh, they're comin' right for us!!"
ReplyMost of these are silly, but I know many people with the "The Gobbler Guillotine Wild Turkey Broadhead;" or more accurately, knock of versions there of. My best friend refuses to use them because he's somewhat kind hearted. But the vast majority of people who buy them are very good at archery, (Most people wouldn't buy specialized arrowheads if they were not very good at it) and it's just a tool. Turkeys are so stupid. Who cares?
Reply Hide All See All 5 RepliesThe turkey ... probably the Turkey's mother aswell.
i have never given a s**t what dinner has thought.
The turkey doesn't care. It's dead.
Turkeys also don't raise their young for life. Attributing human emotions and rational intelligence to animals is pretty childish, wouldn't you say?
SerapisMetal, you just showed how little you know about animals and humans alike. I mean, hunting turkeys is whatever, the great chain of life or something, but regarding levels of intelligence and emotions to animals is anything but childish. Only an child would misunderstand themselves as great beings above the animal world. But then again, most hunters don't believe evolution is a real thing.
Ghettoblaster, seriously, just stop. You're the most childish one here right now, and you're also the one acting like real animals are exactly like their Disney counterparts.