Top Picks for July

Some of the best stuff from around the web and the Cracked.com Mirth Canal.

07.31.2009

An entertainment website attempts to do the impossible: [Asylum announces a day without Megan Fox]

The most important debate our president will ever be involved in: [CNN]
Thanks to PaleHorse in the Mirth Canal.

How divorces happen in Footloose: [College Humor]

Sarah Palin's tweets read by William Shatner: [Huffington Post]

In other news, TO does absolutely zero to ensure he doesn't become a walking joke: [Fark]

Douchebags from Comic-Con: [The Chive]

Your weekly celebrity dish: [Ask Men]

These people will regret these purchases the next day: [Uncoached]

Merry Christmas!: [Gorillamask]

The 16 Worst Cartoon Theme Songs of the 80s: [TV Munchies]

The 11 Best Beers That Will Get You Drunk But Not Fat: [11Points]

What's going to happen when she finds out Captain Crunch isn't really a captain?: [Consumerist]
Thanks to projectjulio in the Mirth Canal.

10 Classic Cult TV Shows: [Liquid Generation]

What your sexual fantasies say about you (furries need not read): [lemondrop]

The 10 Best Mighty Boosh Clips: [Adult Swim]

10 Badass Female JOEs: [Mania]

Terrible car modifications: [I Am Bored]

A couple of alternatives to FML: [GMH] and [MLIA]

80 of the sexiest backs on the planet: [Coed Magazine]

The only flying-V better than Mighty Ducks': [College Humor]

And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: 2004 produced a mediocre film and, apparently, a featurable page.
Submitted by Wickbam in the Mirth Canal.

07.28.2009

EA knows how to treat its female employees: [Kotaku]
Thanks to Doctor Shenanigans in the Mirth Canal.

The real Game Genie: [College Humor]

Lego toys ain't nuthin' to fuck wit: [Huffington Post]

Michael Jackson to be nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize: [Fark]

Meanwhile, his nose has gone missing: [New York Daily News]

20 Parodies of the Last Supper: [The Chive]

If you don't want to be treated like a girl, maybe you should stop acting like one: [Ask Men]

10 Great Nicknames for Sports Stuff in Movies: [Uncoached]

Aida Iveliz has child birthing boobs: [Gorillamask]

Six Funniest Harry Potter Sex Spoofs: [Whip It Out]

11 Old School Nintendo Tricks Permanently Burned Into Our Brains: [11Points]

The ultimate Coca-Cola machine: [YouTube]
Thanks to keinkampf in the Mirth Canal.

Which twin is hotter?: [Liquid Generation]

This proves there's at least some good left in the world: [lemondrop]

Adult Swim's most awkward Comic-Con moments: [Adult Swim]

Or find out what the costumed folks at Comic-Con think about things they are highly unqualified to discuss (like sex): [Mania]

An inside look at Where the Wild Things Are: [I Am Bored]

Your Comic-Con summary: [Comics Alliance]

How to hit on women: Step 1) Mention her Wikipedia page: [Asylum]

Sexy, scantily clad cosplay girls: [Coed Magazine]

"I'm sorry, what was your name again?": [College Humor]

And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: Le Petomane, the Master Flatulist.
Submitted by oball in the Mirth Canal.

07.23.2009

They asked the masses what concerns today's man, and here are the results: [Ask Men]

We'd watch C-SPAN a lot more if American politics were like this: [BBC]
Thanks to DevlindeSade in the Mirth Canal.

It's only a matter of time before they're blowing up the Statue of Liberty: [College Humor]

Hot chicks working on computers. Is "nerdgasm" a word?: [The IT Chicks]

Kuroshio Sea: The second largest aquarium tank in the world: [Fark]

Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland: [Huffington Post]

What employers really mean when they turn you down: [Uncoached]

Please, sir, can we have some Moya: [Gorillamask]

Seven Coolest Men's Magazine Ads: [Whip It Out]

11 Sexy Photos Totally Ruined By People in the Background: [11Points]

Press conferences never sounded so good: ["Press Hop," DJ Steve Porter]
Thanks to Quagmar in the Mirth Canal.

10 Stars of Celebrity Sex Tapes: [Liquid Generation]

Straight from their lips: Sci-fi guys the ladies at lemondrop would do: [lemondrop]

Hookers. Zombies. 'Nuff said: [Adult Swim]

The most relevant charts and graphs of our time: [I Am Bored]

Dirty comics by great artists: [Comics Alliance]

Not even the WWE could top this storyline: [Asylum]

The 210 Most Shameful Drunken Shamings: [Coed Magazine]

"The quicker you settle down and smile, the quicker we can throw your suits on the grill for dinner.": [College Humor]

And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: A disturbing history of human/goat relations.
Submitted by Lieutenant Geyser Shitdick in the Mirth Canal.

07.21.2009

A special message from MCA of the Beastie Boys: [YouTube]

Big wiener proves too much to handle for 22-year-old female: [NBC]
Thanks to Cracked_User in the Mirth Canal.

Sprite: Just like suckin' dick: [College Humor]

The Venetian's bathroom doesn't compare to Conan's: [Huffington Post]

10 Things Hugh Hefner Probably Says Before Having Sex: [Uncoached]

Lady Leanne shows us how to wear the Borat bathing suit: [Gorillamask]

Ben Stiller really loves dolphins: [Ask Men]

Six Funniest Dirty Jokes From Dustin Hoffman: [Trailer Trasher]

HOLY SHIT OUR EYES: [MAWI]
Thanks to BattleKitten in the Mirth Canal.

10 Surprising Guests On Reno 911: [Liquid Generation]

Poke a dead body down the river: [Adult Swim]

Ducks are the village idiots of the Animal Kingdom, apparently: [I Am Bored]

The greatest non-nude scenes of all time: [Asylum]

Introducing the tandem boob-press: [Coed Magazine]

In the year 2000, Michael Jackson will become Lando Calrissian: [College Humor]

And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: Why your glue might not be working.

07.14.2009

17 Worst Haircuts in the Ottoman Empire: [xkcd]

Glenn Beck loses his shit on-air: [YouTube]
Thanks to Siebenstein in the Mirth Canal.

How did this guy lose to Luke Skywalker with moves like that?: [College Humor]

The infamous Michael Jackson Pepsi blunder: [Huffington Post]

Gillian Leigh wears bras, shirts, hay, women: [Gorillamask]

How To Pick Your Meat (for men and women): [Ask Men]

Woman tweets during bank robbery; doesn't call police: [The AP]
Thanks to ninja in the Mirth Canal.

Hmm... maybe there's something in a meatless, furless lifestyle: [Liquid Generation]

The Legend of Old Gregg: [Adult Swim]

When frat boy antics meets Animal Planet: [I Am Bored]

No longer is porn only for those of us who can see: [Asylum]

77 Homemaking Hotties: [Coed Magazine]

What the fuck is going on in this commercial? (warning: may cause seizures): [College Humor]

Four Actors That Should Be Playing Spider-Man Villains: [Mania]

And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: Everything you wanted to know about Jughead's hat and more.

07.14.2009

Some guy with famous people: [POMAFB]
Thanks to Doctor Shenanigans in the Mirth Canal.

You just got served Kim Jong-il: [College Humor]

Conando to the rescue!: [Huffington Post]

More sand-bras with Christy West! Featuring less sand: [Gorillamask]

How To Read Faces (if you win the WSOP you owe us half the earnings): [Ask Men]

Amazing short film: [Adam Berg's Carousel]
Thanks to The Furlinator in the Mirth Canal.

UFC fighter gives an interviewer a piece of his mind (by mind we mean dry-humping): [Liquid Generation]

Twirl and Hurl 2: [Adult Swim]

Redneck bottle opener: [I Am Bored]

Put a baby picture in your wallet (even if the child isn't yours): [Asylum]

It might be time to take up biking: [Coed Magazine]

And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: Moves that will turn you into Hulk Hogan (minus the steroids).

07.10.2009

Michael Jackson will not be returning as a zombie: [The Guardian]
Thanks to Honest Abe in the Mirth Canal.

Saving Private Ryan on a $100 budget: [College Humor]

Is thi... Is this what babies do?: [Huffington Post]

Erica Underwood is giving us not-so-under-wood... she's hot: [Gorillamask]

Britney Spears to join the ranks of Amy Winehouse, Billy Joel and Gene Simmons (and not for rampant substance abuse): [Ask Men]

Absolutely incredible music video: ["Hibi no Neiro" by Sour]
Thanks to nchammer326 in the Mirth Canal.

Top 10 Trashiest Quotes from Strangers with Candy: [Liquid Generation]

Family Guy's best side-characters: [Adult Swim]

Get you some, Obama: [I Am Bored]

Merriam-Webster adds some more words. The rest of the world goes on blissfully unaware: [Asylum]

Sixty Sexy Tube Sock Girls: [Coed Magazine]

And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: Einstein's first wife (the one who wasn't his cousin).

07.07.2009

Australians sure are whacky: [9 News]
Thanks to HyperGlavin in the Mirth Canal.

The ultimate atomic wedgie: [College Humor]

15 Creepy Vintage Ads [Retro Comedy]

Drink up. The beer belly is a myth. [The Frisky]

Turns out the Mexicans are trying to keep us out: [Huffington Post]

In these times of economic hardship, please do what you can to help: [College Humor]

More sand undergarments with Carin Ashley: [Gorillamask]

5 Lies All Women Tell: [Ask Men]

Great Moments in Sexy Celebrities With Food in Their Mouths: [UnCoached]

To cheap to get your hair cut? Try this: [CCTV]
Thanks to tlcfasho in the Mirth Canal.

The Michael Jackson Sleepover Kit: [Liquid Generation]

Zombies and hookers as one (try not to soil yourself): [Adult Swim]

Dry humping to Blur? Really?: [I Am Bored]

Megan Fox as a cheerleader and that chick from Heroes kissing another chick. What more could you ask for?: [Asylum]

The Megan Fox Sex Soundboard: [Coed Magazine]

And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: More than you would ever care to know about chamber music.

07.03.2009

If you're going to fail a class, do it right: [Ace Online Schools]
Thanks to yugosakimi in the Mirth Canal.

Squirrels don't only live in trees: [Huffington Post]

An argument between tattoos: [College Humor]

Aylen Alvarez shows us her sand bra: [Gorillamask]

Top 10: Things You Never Say to a Woman: [Ask Men]

When golf and hot chicks become one, magic happens: [College Humor]

10 Most Awkward High School Yearbook Photos Of Heavy Metal Stars. [Funk Jelly]

French people never cease to baffle us: [CCTV]
Thanks to BattleKitten in the Mirth Canal.

10 National Anthem Performances We Wish Could be Taken Back. [Uncoached]

Pornstar or Pop Star? (Likely NSFW): [Liquid Generation]

Dirty Squidbilly sex: [Adult Swim]

A short film by Pixar: [I Am Bored]

10 Muppets That Should Have Warped Us [TV Munchies]

Sexy and patriotic (Happy Fourth of July!): [Asylum]

A guide to not fucking up your fireworks display this weekend: [Coed Magazine]

And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: Red headed people!

Still have time to waste? Check out June's Top Picks.

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