It's pretty hard to screw up a bicycle. Two wheels, a metal frame, a pair of handlebars, an uncomfortable seat and some skintight shorts to accentuate your crotch bulge, and you're already a few weeks away from qualifying for the Tour de France.
But one man thought differently. One man thought, "This bike thing is just too damn easy. What can I do to mess that up?" That man is Curtis DeForest, and he is a little bit crazy.
For some reason DeForest doesn't like the idea that bikes don't require an obscene amount of effort, and thus he made an unholy union between a bicycle and the type of wheelchair you probably see in your dreams right after a drug-induced bike accident. And with that, the HyperBike was born.
The big selling point of the Hyperbike as far as Curtis is concerned is that you have to use your entire body to move it, which translates into pedaling with your hands and feet, guaranteeing you expend every available ounce of energy and dignity while reaching your destination.
Even if you have spent years lamenting the ease and maneuverability of the typical bicycle, there's still another huge problem: Where in the hell do you ride the damn thing? It's too wide to use on the sidewalk or in a bike lane. Hell, storing the thing in your garage probably means you have to get rid of a car. It's pretty obvious that the only real world use for a HyperBike is to slowly pedal around a deserted parking lot while a man with a white ponytail talks about how awesome it is.