#2. The Entire Existence of Lamborghini Sports Cars
Joe Raedle/Getty Images News/Getty Images
Lots of people use "haters" to motivate them. You know, somebody disrespects you in your youth, so you spend the next several years getting really good at rapping. You wouldn't think, however, that a person would take the trouble to turn a personal slight into one of the most prestigious automobile brands in the world. Yet tractor builder and former mechanic Ferruccio Lamborghini developed his luxury Italian cars for the sole purpose of screwing over a man named Enzo Ferrari, and keeping up with him -- rather than turning a profit -- became his primary mission in life.
Yes, this is what a Lamborghini used to look like.
In the early 1960s, Lamborghini went to Ferrari to complain about the clutch, which he considered the weak point on an otherwise superlative automobile. Clearly disdainful of the clutch-hating pleb, Enzo Ferrari responded, "You know how to drive a tractor, but you'll never learn to drive a Ferrari." Pissed off and in possession of a bankroll large enough to make his point universally heard, Lamborghini created his own car. He was determined to succeed, even selling his 350GT model at a loss to stay competitive with Ferrari.
Thus marked the beginning of using sports cars in dick measuring contests.
By 1963, when Lamborghini ran into his rival in a restaurant and tried to say hello, Ferrari turned his head and ignored him. In a 1984 interview, the incredibly devoted automaker recalled the decades-old slight and said, "If Enzo Ferrari hadn't made that crack ... I might never have built my Lamborghinis." Hell, that makes us wonder if Lamborghini even liked making cars, or if he'd rather have been a farmer. Just bitterly overseeing his production line, spitting in rage with each finished vehicle. "Fuck you, Ferrari! We just finished another one!"
Well, as the old saying goes, "Devoting your life to designing, building, and selling half-million-dollar luxury sports cars is the best revenge."
If there's a moral in all of this, we guess it's "Cars. Pretty great, right?"
#1. A 700-Year Dispute Involving a Stolen Bucket
In the early 1300s, there was an ongoing conflict between the Italian city-states of Bologna and Modena, for the usual reasons people went to war back then (Bologna was loyal to the Pope, while Modena bore allegiance to the Holy Roman Emperor). How the whole thing came to be about a stolen bucket, however, takes some explaining.
In 1325, Bologna got their ass handed to them by Modena at the so-called Battle of Zappolino. In addition to beating the Bolognese, the Modenese rubbed the victory in their face, both by holding a sporting event outside the walls of the defeated city ... and by stealing an oak bucket from their well. They kept it as a trophy to show off their victory. That was in 1325. They still have it.
"Are you sure we have enough viewing seats? We don't want a rehash of the All Bucket's Eve disaster."
That's supposedly the original bucket, which the Modenese keep in a glass display case, purely as a spiteful taunt to their rival city nearly 700 freaking years later. They even at some point made a replica bucket and suspended it from the bell tower of their cathedral:
It's filled with pee to deter theft.
And for seven straight centuries, any time anybody from Bologna tries to talk shit, the people of Modena have the ultimate comeback: "Well, we've still got your bucket, asshole."
For more spiteful creations, check out 7 Great Foods (That Were Created Thanks to Dick Moves) and 5 Villains That Were Thinly-Veiled Versions of Real People.
If you're pressed for time and just looking for a quick fix, then check out 5 Ways We're Totally Ruining Kickstarter.
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