As we've demonstrated many times before in our most popular feature on Cracked, the forces of the universe love the sound of people shouting "Fake!" at their computer screens, and photographers love to capture the proof. In case you missed the previous episodes, here's Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, the gritty reboot that doesn't acknowledge the previous editions, Part 6, Part 7 and Part 8.
And now ...
Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster
Another normal day at Innsmouth Beach.
It looks like three surfers are about to be devoured by a Lovecraftian sea monster or a horde of giant octopi. It just depends on how ridiculous the low-budget horror movie that it was taken from is.
Actually, that's just what a wave looks like when it's full of sunlight and enough seaweed to choke a sperm whale, and it's not all that uncommon. Of course, that just means that when the tentacled monsters do decide to attack, they'll blend right in with the seaweed until it's too late.
What looks like a screen cap from a CGI-heavy Super Bowl commercial is actually a real, not-manipulated photograph. And no, those aren't posed ant corpses with a bottle cap hot glued to their tiny hands, if that's what you think, Professor Coldheart. It's from a series of images that photographer Andrey Pavlov took outside his house, after studying and then making an art project out of a real live ant colony. He's a former set designer, which allowed him to make some pretty incredible sets for the ants to interact with in the most stereotypically industrious ways possible.
Seen here, reeling in a 300-pound marlin.
Seeing ants get things done at this scale is inspiring, but if you're anything like us, that sensation quickly turns to a sense of foreboding for the day when they finally decide to rise up and take humanity down.
Even knowing that it's not Photoshopped, it takes a few minutes to figure out what's going on in this photo from the Sports Illustrated archive. And judging from the amazed look on the face of the kid at the right edge of the photo, it wasn't any easier in person.
Unfortunately for Norway's hockey team, #55 Ole-Kristian Tollefsen does not possess Nightcrawler's ability to magically disappear out of a sticky situation. If you look at his left armpit, you can just see his hair peeking out where his head is being held down. We'd like to think the little ginger-haired kid was a fan of X-Men, and left the game telling his dad, "I know what I saw, OK?"
We're used to painters portraying the world around them with less and less photo-realistic precision, but it would appear that no one told the real world that it doesn't get to use artistic license, too. Australian photographer Ken Prior snapped the nearly visible brushstrokes in the above sky over Scotland. The photo is the result of a mysterious, as yet unclassified cloud type that's been showing up all over the United Kingdom and New Zealand, and wherever else Prior happens to have his camera pointed at the sky.
Ken Prior via The Cloud Appreciation Society
Behold! The groping fingers of a kinky God.
Meteorologists are calling them asperatus clouds, while people who aren't insecure about being confused with the weatherman are using the more straightforward Jacques Cousteau clouds. The names all focus on the fact that they make the sky look like an upside down ocean during a storm, although, looking at some of Prior's other shots, the only common thread is that they all look like the sky in Ghostbusters.
It's hard to tell where the artist was going with this half-finished Photoshopped collage. Our first guess would probably be that he or she was planning to use the different elements of urban development to protest the gentrification of some Brooklyn neighborhood where people who make Photoshopped protest art live. Our 347th guess would be the truth: This is an unaltered photograph of Osaka Stadium.
It was converted into a housing showcase after Japanese baseball's Nankai Hawks moved to a better stadium and another Ali-Frazier rematch called the "'Shocka' in Osaka" failed to materialize. However, as the empty seats indicate, the many people who claimed they'd rather watch paint dry than Japanese baseball proved to be "just saying that."
Those legs aren't Photoshopped, nor are they stilts. The maned wolf just has really long, really skinny legs. We're not sure what the evolutionary advantage of being a living Disney cartoon might be. But we can't see that picture without imagining the corresponding male wolf smoking cigarettes in a derby cap and reminiscing about getting burned by the tramp with the legs that just wouldn't quit.
If we had to guess, we'd say Charlie Brown is Ringo.
This Peanuts-themed Abbey Road cover re-creation was placed on a Japanese road to promote a new ride at Universal Studios Japan. While a road outside of a children's theme park probably isn't the safest place to be distracting drivers, Japanese people are probably used to seeing cartoon characters walking down the street by now. Besides, it's only an adorable bout with surrealism from the perfect angle. Anyone viewing it from above will wonder why Charlie Brown and friends are being sucked into one of the Ghostbusters' containment units.
OK, neither the scenery nor the guy look real in this one, but that's a real stuntman walking up the wire of a cable car that runs from the bottom to the top of Zugspitze Mountain in southern Bavaria. He completed the 9,000-foot climb for world record consideration by Guinness in the category of "longest and highest wire walk above sea level without a balancing pole." And for good measure, he did it without a freaking safety harness, which begs the question: Are there Guinness World Records groupies, and what mind-blowing version of sex have they invented to make a man do something like this:
AP, via News.com.au
"For my next stunt, I'm going to find God's eye and pee in it."
It turns out that with carefully controlled conditions, you can create an actual indoor cloud. Artist Berndnaut Smilde creates the clouds with a fog machine and then carefully monitors the temperature and humidity of the room to get his artificial cloud to hang there long enough to snap a picture. We have to assume he couldn't get it to last long enough to bring his stoned friends in and start commanding them to run his errands in a deep booming voice.