Home > More Funny Stuff > 20 T-Shirts That Will Make Women Have Sex With You
Featured  

20 T-Shirts That Will Make Women Have Sex With You

By CRACKED Readers
article image

You know what's popular these days? Clothing.

We here at Cracked realized that there simply was no place online to buy things you could wear, and certainly no place that sold apparel that was printed with obscure comedy phrases. Thus, we decided to open our own store to fill this need.

All that was left was the witty sayings to print upon the goods, and, devoid of any creativity of our own, we relied on you. The only requirement was that the design had to reference a Cracked article in some way. We're showing off a lot of the designs we liked here, but at the end of the day there could only be a couple of winners, which are shown at the end.

#20.


by harleyquinn, in reference to The Most Disturbing PSA's In The World.


#19.


by scarlet_fuzz, in reference to The 6 Cutest Animals That Can Still Destroy You.


#18.


by Caspian, in reference to The 5 Genetic Experiments Most Likely To Destroy Humanity.


#17.


by The Hulk, in reference to The 9 Manliest Names in the World.


#16.


by baredevil, in reference to The 5 Most Bad-Ass Presidents.


#15.


by homage, in reference to 7 Great Men in History (and Why You Should Hate Them).


#14.


by eddie_lummox, in reference to 9 Words That Don't Mean What You Think.


#13.


by McBeefy, in reference to 5 Inspiring Religions That Worship Penises.


#12.


by McBeefy, in reference to 5 Famous Inventors (Who Stole Their Big Idea).


#11.


by boredatwork, in reference to The 10 Lamest Dinosaur Names.


#10.


by operator, in reference to 5 Psychological Experiments That Prove Humanity is Doomed.


#9.


by eddie_lummox, in reference to The 7 Commandments of Video Games.


#8.


by McBeefy, in reference to Fun With 419 Scammers.


#7.


by Slublog, in reference to 10 Classic Toys (And Why they Suck).


#6.


by lordlim, in reference to The 25 Least Inspiring Military Operation Names.


#5.


by Slublog, in reference to The 5 Pimpingest Historical Figures.


#4.


by kingyak, in reference to Little-Known Facts About the Founding Fathers.


#3.


by captain_awesome, in reference to This blog post.


#2.


by posixbillie, in reference to Dan O'Brien challenging Hannah to a boxing match.


And the winners, both for sale in the store are...

#1.


by Slublog, in reference to 6 Endangered Species That Aren't Endangered Enough.

Guys can click the image to get one. Girls can click here.


#1.


by hyperglavin, in reference to The Most Ridiculous Sports Team Names.

Guys can click the image to get one. Girls can click here.


Congrats, guys. You win money.

Know Photoshop? Like cash?

Enter next week's contest. This week's Photoshop contest theme is:

What The '08 Presidential Campaign Would Look Like if the Candidates Had Balls.

We're pretty much down to two candidates now. What would their bumper stickers, T-Shirts, campaign ads, rallies, speeches, press conferences... parades... whatever, look like if they decided they weren't spinning, soft pedaling or sugar coating a damn thing until November, and just started telling shit like it is?

Post your entries in the forums.


Submit to: Reddit Facebook StumbleUpon Digg Del.icio.us

Post Comment

60 Comments

That Technosaurus shirt has to be made. I'd buy it in a heartbeat.

Posted on 5/13/2008 8:14:33 AM

Go away, Rihanna.

Posted on 5/12/2008 3:16:24 PM

thanks for the love on #10 (mine) :-D

Posted on 5/12/2008 1:07:33 PM

I would buy 10-8 without hesitation.

Posted on 5/12/2008 12:38:26 PM

I'm biased to Half-Life, but 9 is still hilarious.

Posted on 5/11/2008 2:34:02 PM

10 was by far the greatest, and I would wear it dearly.

Posted on 5/11/2008 2:20:08 PM

I met my new friends at a cele hot club __Blackgirlsconnect.com__ several days ago. It is a funny and interesting place. So nice to talk and date some girls or guys on here.

Posted on 5/11/2008 8:51:14 AM

7,5 and 3 please

Posted on 5/10/2008 11:54:19 PM

I would absolutely wear number 14.

Posted on 5/10/2008 7:28:13 PM

I don' suppose that a publishing deal with Snorg is in the works?

Posted on 5/10/2008 7:21:16 PM

Love #16

Posted on 5/10/2008 7:10:44 PM

#16 is inspirational.

Posted on 5/10/2008 3:53:15 PM

I don't care what you say, I'd wear #11.

Posted on 5/10/2008 3:41:44 PM

who the fuck picks these.. the pornstar one sucks and the panda one is okay at best.. I'd totally buy the technosaraus because a)its funny if you get the joke and b) its awesome anyway

Posted on 5/10/2008 2:38:48 PM

I wouldn't sleep with a guy wearing the Pornstars shirt, but probably the Panda one.

Posted on 5/10/2008 2:20:44 PM

I want a shirt that says "Hello, my name is Staff Sgt. Max Fightmaster"

Posted on 5/10/2008 6:48:10 AM

The Panda bear one is great, the Pornstar one is a bit generic I think. I love 20, and I have no idea what its about and never read the article. But I'd still buy it.

Posted on 5/10/2008 4:07:40 AM

I'd totally buy a shirt of #9!

Posted on 5/10/2008 3:14:38 AM

I get the impression that no one liked Spider Goat. I would complain, but I only spent like 18 minutes making it, so I don't really care.

Posted on 5/9/2008 11:35:09 PM

I think that's the point. There's no point wearing a t-shirt with a joke on it if you have to explain the joke to everyone who doesn't read this web-site.

Posted on 5/9/2008 10:22:47 PM

More Funny Stuff


Popular stuff


Avatar
Ross Wolinsky
Posted: 5/13/2008 10:07:07 AM
Post Subject: The Most Anticlimatic Story Of All Time: The Daily Nooner (EST)!

You probably think I'm going to make fun of Marche Taylor for wearing a skimpy dress to her prom and getting escorted out in handcuffs, don't you? Admit it: you think I'm going to go off on a ran ...

Avatar How Do You Insure a Drunken Superhero?
An interesting little sidebar to the success of the Ironman films, are the reports about how Robert ...
Avatar The Weather Channel Sex Scandal: Oxymoron No Longer
The Weather Channel. The phrase brings to mind thoughts of planning your weekend, flipping through e ...
Avatar American TV Sucks. Thanks For Rubbing It In, Japan: The Daily Nooner (EST)
Ever since this whole War on Terror thing started, America has been slowly and steadily falling ...
Avatar 8 Things That Pissed Me Off About The FoxNews Fat Cops Report
Last week, something happened to me for the first time: I had an internet success. The premiere epi ...
Avatar 5 Things The Cracked Readers Apparently Want to Read About
digg_url = 'http://www.cracked.com/blog/2008/05/09/5-things-the-cracked-readers-apparently-w ...
Avatar Now That Was Entertainment! The Friday Nooner (EST)!
Ross Wolinsky is taking a personal day today. Filling in for him will be his grandfather, Pappy ...
Avatar Florida Threatens To Secede, America Goes Back To Sleep
Yes, Florida is actually trying to split into two, with one half (presumably the one with Disney Wor ...
Avatar The 10 Worst Ice Cream Flavors Ever (An Obituary)
I love ice cream. It’s the only dessert that when I eat it, it somehow gets into my stomach and pu ...
Avatar Giving The Weirdos Their Due: The Daily Nooner (EST)!
Dear People With Very Specific Skills Who Put Repetitive Videos Of Themselves Showing Off Th ...
Recently Popular
Recently popular on Digg