We tend to forget that humans are but a fraction of a natural world that encompasses millions of other species. And thanks to our increasingly urbanized civilization, a lot of us get super excited when we spot animals in the wild -- and we downright lose our shit when they're discovered in a place we simply don't anticipate them to be.
Which creatures are we referring to? Well ...
Travelers walking up England's highest mountain, Scafell Pike, were treated to an unusual travel buddy -- an 8-inch octopus, lying on a rock a mere 10 meters from the mountain's summit.
Although octopuses sometimes get a kick out of running around on dry land -- especially when they're going senile -- this cephalopod would've had to run a marathon to scale the mountain. Climbers thought that a bird might have scooped it up and dropped the poor eight-armed vagabond down there. That, or Cthulhu is buried under this mountain, and this dead guy was making a pilgrimage.
In what some folks speculated was a totally fucked-up Shark Week stunt, passengers aboard New York's N train were met with an unfamiliar sight one August morning: a dead shark lying on the floor.
You cross the fish mafia, you "sleep with the humans."
How'd the animal end up on public transportation? Why, through a series of events worthy of stoner fiction. First, a bunch of kids found the shark while swimming at Coney Island in Brooklyn. The shark then ended up next to a roller coaster, where a man found it and decided to take the carcass home, Harry and the Hendersons style.
He then got bored of his newfound ornament upon fully realizing that there was a dead shark in his hands, so he left it on the subway, where confused passengers proceeded to embarrass our fallen champion of the deep with tawdry human vices.
Juan D. Cano via Gothamist
Continuing the sad culture of "shark shaming."
In what should probably be deemed the ultimate physical manifestation of pushing it to the limit, NASA recently captured a photo of this high-flying frog, who was flung into the night sky like an amphibious bat out of hell by a nearby rocket.
And somewhere the world's worst exec has just come up with a Mr. Toad's Wild Ride reboot.
NASA representatives believe that the frog had been swimming in the high-volume deluge pool beneath the rocket, which is intended to prevent the spread of fire as it takes off. The frog's final fate was uncertain, although it's likely he now has a throne in the halls of Valhalla for losing a fistfight with a 197,034-pound tube of orbital fuck-yeah.
And while everyone else on this planet would've started prepping a Neti pot filled with battery acid, Goldberg calmly extricated the tick and sent it to the lab for examination. There, his suspicions were confirmed -- clawing into his goobers was a possible new species of tick. In any case, this discovery should earn him the Super-Special Nobel Prize for Arachnid Detection, which must be invented solely for this occasion.
One fine September day in New Brunswick, Canada, a young colt was left home alone. His stable mates were at the local track for training, so the bored horse climbed up a small knoll behind his owner's garage, which he ascended because horse logic.
And the colt would've gotten away with this caper, too, if his hoof hadn't smashed a hole, leaving him embarrassingly stranded before all creation. Fortunately, his owners were able to coax him down before the NEEEEIGH-bors complained. (We'll see ourselves out of this article now.)
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