Good Idea: Remove Every Trump Cameo
After realizing that electing an anthropomorphic garbage bag full of KFC and racism as President was a bad idea, a lot of folks are scrambling to purge their association with Donald Trump following the deadly mob riot he incited and the subsequent impeachment sequel it provoked. Now fans are suggesting that Trump's cameo should be scrubbed from the family movie classic Home Alone 2: Lost in New York.
After all, we don't need the appearance of this fascist blowhard ruining the otherwise wholesome story of a small child committing both credit card fraud and attempted murder. Even star Macaulay Culkin is apparently down with George Lucas-ing Trump out of the film.
This isn't censoring art; the scene exists purely because Trump bullied the filmmakers into writing it, telling them: "The only way you can use the Plaza is if I'm in the movie." Other productions filming in Trump properties worked around this narcissistic proviso by simply cutting the scene, but Home Alone 2 left Trump in because test audiences at the time "cheered" when he showed up. Seeing as the majority of Americans supported impeaching him a second time, we doubt that the same reasoning applies anymore.
Plus, Trump's fleeting appearance in Home Alone 2 is totally unnecessary, presumably because it was designed to end up on the cutting room floor. Really, why would Kevin McCallister, who has capably masterminded deadly booby traps worthy of Jigsaw, need assistance finding the spacious lobby of a luxury hotel?
But why stop there? Screw it: why not cut Trump out of every movie he appears in? We don't need his toxic presence befouling the Hugh Grant/Sandra Bullock rom-com Two Weeks Notice, for example.
And does The Little Rascals really need the scene in which it's revealed that Trump is the absentee father of the shitty, self-entitled rich kid villain? ... Okay, that one actually makes sense.
Seemingly the only Trump role that is integral to a film's plot is his appearance in Ghosts Can't Do It, the '80s spirit-based sex comedy starring Bo Derek. So instead of trying to cut Trump out, maybe we can just round up any remaining VHS copies that might exist and hurl them into the sea.
Top Image: 20th Century Studios