Ever since that very first no-good punk caveman vandalized some perfectly fine cave walls, humans have kept on creating "art." But what is art, anyway? That's a damn good question. What? Did you expect us to have an answer? We're uncultured swine! Plus, art can be pretty much anything. Just look at ...

High Art Made From Lowly Jeans Material

Ian Berry captures the gritty side of city life through a medium that hasn't been used to make an artistic statement since the early '90s: denim.

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Ian Berry

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Ian Berry
Creating works that are both thought-provoking and machine-washable.

Berry doesn't use dyes, so it can take him several weeks to achieve all those shades of urban decay. Like a redneck mosaic, he stitches together tiny individual elements cut from various denims, from the humble pair of workman's jeans to the vainglorious Whitesnake vest. And Berry has a near endless supply of denim, thanks to people from all over the world sending him their mom jeans in the hopes that they might be used for something less embarrassing than wearing them.

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Ian Berry

Mind-Blowing Pieces of Art (Made With The Most Random Stuff)
Ian Berry
Forget you, Picasso. THIS is a blue period.

In addition to those city scenes and portraits, Berry has created the Secret Garden, a lush jungle oasis put together from the last batch of denim made in the United States. It's for the New York City Children's Museum of the Arts, and Berry hopes it will inspire kids to play outside and discover nature. Because what says "nature" like artificial flowers made from cotton that's been pulverized and factory-assembled into the roughest fabric we deign to touch?

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Ian Berry
Hopefully it comes with an assurance that real nature is a lot less likely to give you rug burn.

The Professional Hand Flutist

Mitsuhiro Mori is the only world-class flutist who doesn't own a flute. Instead, the (obviously) self-taught musician can mimic any note by blowing into his hands.

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Mori was discovered by his college buddy, pianist Keisuke Usuda, who realized his unique ability could change the music world ... or at least look weird enough that people would pay a lot of money to see it. Thus was the hand-flute / piano duo called Childhood born.

Although their inspirational New Age sound hasn't yet convinced the masses to put down their arms and embrace one another with open hands/flutes, it has taken them around the world to perform for Earth's most discerning novelty instrument aficionados.

Stunning Paintings Done On Dirty Cars

Scott Wade lived in rural Texas for more than 20 years, where he spent much of that time doodling on the family cars' dirty windshields, because there's not much else to do in rural Texas. Wade's once-silly pastime has since blossomed into a unique skill he's exhibited for audiences in Istanbul, Mexico City, and anywhere else they have way more cars than car washes.

Mind-Blowing Pieces of Art (Made With The Most Random Stuff)

Mind-Blowing Pieces of Art (Made With The Most Random Stuff)
Scott Wade
We honestly can't understand why he paints anything besides this.

Like Michelangelo's first encounter with the Medicis or Vincent van Gogh moving to Arles, every great artist has their breakout moment. Wade's epiphany manifested when he thought to use a frayed, chewed-up Popsicle stick as a paintbrush. The discovery inspired him to try other tools and develop his craft.

Mind-Blowing Pieces of Art (Made With The Most Random Stuff)
Scott Wade
We guess that's good, but still, it's no Dogs Playing Poker.

In a perfect world, Wade says he prefers to use "natural canvases," or naturally dirty cars. It takes a lot of back road driving for windshields to accumulate that much dirt, though, so for his shows, Berry coats the windshields with oil and uses a blow dryer to apply fine dirt or powdered mineral.

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Scott Wade
He's the Claude Monet of the mud-caked '88 Plymoth Colt.

Intricately Carved Food Waste

Heidao, or Chinese nut carving, burst onto the scene more than 800 years ago during the Song Dynasty. By mid-millennium, it had become such a craze that even the emperor was said to flaunt his nuts.

Mind-Blowing Pieces of Art (Made With The Most Random Stuff)
Mark Lawson Antiques
FYI, that was the line we wrote this article for.

But it's not limited to nuts. Artisans also carve intricate scenes of daily life, mythology, or Chinese history into fruit pits from apricots, cherries, olives, or more popularly, peach, because the peach is a symbol of vitality, and also because "peach" shares a pronunciation with "escape." Sometimes art is a fickle mistress; other times, not so much.

Sometimes the carvings are fashioned into beads:

Mind-Blowing Pieces of Art (Made With The Most Random Stuff)
Jewelscollectingdust.co.uk

Or gaudy necklaces:

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Fetheray.com

But the Mona Lisa of food waste is a little boat hewn from an olive pit in 1737 by legendary nutter Ch'en Tsu-chang:

Mind-Blowing Pieces of Art (Made With The Most Random Stuff)
Ch'en Tsu-chang/National Palace Museum
It's a masterpiece small enough to fit in your nose (not that you should take that as a challenge).

He was inspired by "Latter Ode On The Red Cliff," a poem by Su Tung-p'o, which describes a moonlit boat ride with friends. Ch'en not only carved the boat itself, but also placed the poet inside it, along with his seven homies, chairs, dishes, and windows on tiny hinges. He also engraved 300 characters from the poem onto the boat's hull. Pit carvings remain popular today thanks to nutsmiths like Liu Jun, who studied the sculpting disciplines for eight years before cracking the Bigs.

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Liu Jun/VCG
"Bigs" being something of a relative term here.

Masterpieces Done Purely In MS Paint

Pat Hines has succeeded where many have leapt, but few have flown. He not only creates competent graphics, but stunning art with Microsoft Paint.

Mind-Blowing Pieces of Art (Made With The Most Random Stuff)
Pat Hines
Whereas for most people, opening this image in Paint would be a pain in the ass.

Hines has spent the past 15 years mastering MS Paint, much of that time while working an overnight reception job at a Boston hospital on a primitive Windows computer. Since he's a normal human and didn't enjoy Minesweeper or Solitaire, he spent much of that time messing around with Paint, proving that you can get good at anything if you spend enough time doing it.

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Pat Hines
Which was apparently a lot quicker than our best guess on how long it would take to get good at Paint (which, incidentally, is "forever").

Each image requires several weeks of delicate mouse-work, because Hines doesn't rely on crutches like a tablet or a pen. He does use the line tool from an older version of Paint, but even Michelangelo used a ruler every now and then.

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Pat Hines
Though at that rate, pieces like this probably feel like they take about four score and seven years to complete.

Hines more recently put his Paint skills to use. He spent two years writing and illustrating Camp Redblood, a comedic '80s-style adventure about rowdy teenage summer campers fending off supernatural beasts while still taking time to prank their rivals.

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Pat Hines
Somehow "This was done in Paint! Motherfucking PAINT" doesn't appear on the cover, or for that matter, every page.

Wow. We can't wait to see what Hines will do when he discovers clip art.

The Most Beautiful Joints You Will Ever Smoke

When Tony Greenhand dropped out of high school, people expected him to spend his days rolling joints and playing Call Of Duty, but no one expected him to turn that lifestyle into art, fame, and most shocking of all, a living wage. Greenhand, a professional weed artist, rolls joints out of Biggie's wildest dreams.

Mind-Blowing Pieces of Art (Made With The Most Random Stuff)
Tony Greenhand
Assuming he'd lived to see Futurama's golden age, that is.

Greenhand -- which is, incredibly, not his real name -- charges $50 per hour for his services, but he's no capitalist pig. He'll also roll you a doob in exchange for some bacon or blueberries, both of which might be slang terms that we just don't get. He used to create his art purely for the love of the game, but thanks to his newfound social media fame, he's currently taking commissions from celebrities ranging from Snoop Dogg to B.o.B. OK yes, his clientele is somewhat limited.

Mind-Blowing Pieces of Art (Made With The Most Random Stuff)
Tony Greenhand
Of course, Snoop has something of a history of supporting artisans.

But make no mistake, the man is a serious artist. He's even journeyed all the way to the Dominican Republic and Cuba to study master cigar rollers. He also rolls for the good of humankind. This 12-gram Spider-Man joint sold for $1,100 at a charity auction:

Mind-Blowing Pieces of Art (Made With The Most Random Stuff)
Tony Greenhand
So there you go, every stoned high-schooler: Your picture of Spider-Man holding a joint may have value after all.

And of course, he rolls for prestige, like when he did the world's largest joint, a watermelon filled with 4.20 pounds (get it?) of cannabis that could be inhaled with a hose:

Mind-Blowing Pieces of Art (Made With The Most Random Stuff)
Tony Greenhand
Hopefully it was the seedless variety.

This seems like a good time to bring up the fact that thousands of black men are still incarcerated on marijuana charges in disproportionate numbers. Just something to think about while you giggle at these photos, maybe.

Mind-Blowing Pieces of Art (Made With The Most Random Stuff)
Tony Greenhand

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