A strange driverless car was spotted in Arlington, Virginia. But it turns out it was just a man in a car seat costume. The fake driverless car almost got away with it, if it weren't for those meddling kids-err, a reporter who shot film through the window revealing the "car seat" had legs and arms coming out of it. The intrepid reporter demanded of the phony, "Brother, who are you? What are you doing? I'm with the news, dude." The "driverless" car sped off mysteriously.
It turns out the motives behind the stunt weren't sinister (although this would probably be the setup to the perfect murder). Virginia Tech was doing some kind of study on autonomous cars, probably measuring drivers' reactions to them. But what if this was a complex psychological study on the effects of living as a car seat? An exploration of what separates man from car seat, and how much the human psyche can tolerate being a car seat before it breaks?
This poor research-assistant-turned-car-seat may be participating in the sacred name of science, but what havoc is this wreaking on his life? Does he sit at home, steadfastly in his costume, a drink in what he now calls his "cupholder" (hand)? Does his wife try in vain to get him to eat, only for him to answer coldly, "Car seats have no need for sustenance."
"Come to bed, Dennis, for god's sake. The study has been over for weeks!" his wife exclaims.
"Car seats do not require sleep. But you may recline me to the level of your choosing by pulling on-"
"Oh, Dennis, what have they done to you?!" cries the wife, tears spilling onto her cheeks as she runs from the room.