And then the curse kicked in. He abruptly quit in 2006 so that he could pursue other television opportunities. Those opportunities included playing an asshole in Old School, and culminated with a bit part in the shitty remake The Benchwarmers. That was three years ago.
Oppurtunity ding-dong ditches Craig Kilborn.
Since then he has dropped off the grid. How does that happen? While he was by all accounts an unrepentant prick, Kilborn was a talented comedy writer, and the first host of the best comedy show on TV today. Did his infamous ego get the best of him? Or is there something darker at work here?
The Part Where I Bitterly Compare Our Stories
Kilborn's departure from The Late Show, and anything resembling a career, was strange in that the show was doing fine. He never gave a reason.
On the other hand, there were several problems with my fake news show, "The News on Cracked," which eventually morphed into "The Week In Douchebaggery." (My mom was so proud.) The most prominent problem with the show was, in a word, You. The vast majority of You didn't watch it.
I'm only laughing at how much I hate you.
So I can't say I was shocked when I got the axe. I mean, my weekly notes from Jack consisted of things like: "You don't work here anymore," "Please stop posting more episodes of The Week in Douchebaggery," and "As soon as we figure out the password you're using, we're going to change it." And after all, all good things must come to an end. (Unless they're good things that happen to Swaim or fucking Daniel O'Brien, who was still in college when MY SECOND DAUGHTER WAS BORN. For those two punks, good things just KEEP ON COMING.)
Dan and Swaim arrive at work the day WiD is canceled.
The Part Where I Seamlessly Transition To The Next Victim
But you know who probably WAS surprised to get the axe?