3 Headlines That Prove the News Cycle Is an Infinite Loop

Maybe it's general laziness. Maybe it's some profound cultural tunnel vision brought on by the click-drunk Internet. In any case, it's screamingly obvious that the media have an amazing ability to completely forget the shit they reported just a few years earlier.

Don't believe us? Take a look at three recent news cycles that, when you step back for a moment and dig through the headlines, draw to mind the classic quote, "Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it," which we're pretty sure was coined by Jesse Ventura.

#3. The News Loves to Cannibalize America's Sweetheart

2011: "Everyone loves America's sweetheart, Anne Hathaway," says news.

news.yahoo.com


2012: Anne Hathaway takes a tight-outfit, people-beating role that everyone loves.

eonline.com


2012: The media start rhetorically asking why everyone hates an actress that only the media hate.

screencrush.com


2012: Jennifer Lawrence takes on a tight-outfit, people-beating role that everyone loves.

hollywoodlife.com


2012: "Everyone loves America's sweetheart, Jennifer Lawrence," says news.

rollingstone.com


2013: Old sweetheart is arbitrarily compared to new sweetheart.

nymag.com


2013: The word "backlash" gets bandied around.

live.huffingtonpost.com


2013: Jennifer Lawrence's life is not terrible.

theguardian.com


2014: The word "backlash" gets bandied around.

cbc.ca, moviepilot.com


slate.com


2014: The media start rhetorically asking why everyone hates an actress that only the media hate.

huffingtonpost.com


2014: Old sweetheart is arbitrarily compared to new sweetheart.

crushable.com


2014: "Everyone loves America's sweetheart, Lupita Nyong'o," says news.

perezhilton.com


2014: Lupita Nyong'o is doomed.

masetv.com.previewdns.com


#2. Amanda Bynes Is Sexy and/or Has Mental Issues and/or Has Sexy Mental Issues

2005: Amanda Bynes turns 18. The media begin the arduous task of headline-humping the crap out of her.

egotastic.com


2008:

perezhilton.com


2009:

ranker.com


2010:

huffingtonpost.com


2012/2013: Her public meltdown begins. The media think it's a trip.

hollywoodreporter.com


entertainmentwise.com


nydailynews.com


eonline.com


2013: Everyone realizes that it's not that great to make fun of people with psychiatric problems.

perezhilton.com


theguardian.com


examiner.com


mercurynews.com


2014: Amanda Bynes gets better. The media resume the arduous task of headline-humping the crap out of her.

hollywoodtake.com


abcnews.go.com


#1. Banksy's Graffiti Gets Graffitied

2003: Unnamed "graffiti artist" breaks the law by imposing himself on "real art."

theguardian.com


2004:

news.bbc.co.uk


2005:

npr.org


2005:

theguardian.com


2006:

artofthestate.co.uk


2007: Banksy finally gets a name in the media, but is seen as a nuisance by the government.

standard.co.uk


2008: The media fall in love with Banksy, whose "pranks" turn into "murals."

dailymail.co.uk


2009:

news.bbc.co.uk


2011:

news.fitzrovia.org.uk


2013:

sltrib.com


2013:

huffingtonpost.com


2013:

canterburymuseum.com


2013:

huffingtonpost.com


2014:

parkrecord.com


2014: Unnamed "graffiti artist" breaks the law by imposing himself on "real art."

complex.com


Always on the go but can't get enough of Cracked? We have an Android app and iOS reader for you to pick from so you never miss another article.

More Quick Fixes:

See More

Recommended For Your Pleasure

To turn on reply notifications, click here

0 Comments

Choosing to "Like" Cracked has no side effects, so what's the worst that could happen?

The Weekly Hit List

Sit back... Relax... We'll do all the work.
Get a weekly update on the best at Cracked. Subscribe now!