How to Refer to Someone's Life-Partner [COMIC]
Basic Instructions is a twice weekly updating web comic that offers absurd advice on how to live your life. Some of those updates will be happening here on Cracked.
Previously Scott has taught us How To Ruin Your Childhood Memories and How to Tell a Scary Story.
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How does "common-law wife" sound trailer park? The associations I get from the phrase are more about antiquated English poverty.
Reply"I'm not comfortable with that. I'd like to call her something that implies more commitment on your part"
ReplySomeone check that man for testicles
The comments are funnier than the Article itself. God Bless America.
ReplyChick, girl, lover, lady, woman, romantic interest, creature with a vagina.
ReplyDude, guy, lover, man, romantic interest, c*m dispenser.
Any of those and everyone will be happy
To add to your list:
Penis holder, dick cozzy, fapper pal
haha, it is nice, can I post this artical to my own blog on POZ-Dating[.]Com ? I have many poz friends there, I believe they will love this.
ReplyI always ask this kind of questions, but no respones here, who can tell me whether I can share this with my POZ friends on POZ-Dating[.]Com ?
"How about I just call her your b***h?"
Reply"Dude no"
"Yeah, you're right - bitcehs hate that."
bitcehs are the worst! whatever they are...
Better half?
ReplyChristmas Festival gift . To your friends,
Replya pleasant surprise . Reputation , quality, absolute guarantee .
The same style, not the same, the quality with the price . please log in: " fashionsb "com .
so what, move your mouse Our services: "customer is God."
Whatever happened to "singnificant other", or just "GTFO"?
ReplyLIKE
ReplyLike a pre-makeout boner, this is growing on me.
ReplyPretty good. The best I've seen so far.
Replyif a couple have been together for years i just call her the wife, and if he insists on telling me that they are not married then i just refer to her by name.
Replyholy s**t!!! this was actually....cant believe this....not bad. I actually had a bit of a smile crack my pre armed, 'ready-to-hate' you, judgmental face. Also a plus, is that people who aren't whiney jerk offs can actually relate to the subject matter. nicely done.
ReplyBefore we married I refered to my husband as my "spouse equivalent" or SE for short.
Reply Hide All See All 3 RepliesOuch.
brilliant
please god tell me your SE's name is Mac
Bad subnormality is a regular fare now so Basic Instructions is getting good?
Replylol
I don't even have to read the comic anymore, all my buddies here on cracked rewrite the f**king thing for me in the comment section, complete with airquotes.
ReplyThis is great!
ReplyGotta love how Scott tries to strongarm neckbeard into showing more committment towards his woman. :p
Reply"Boss?" "I tried that, but she ordered me to stop."
ReplyYES.