Turns out romance is really just tasting other humans and blood going from point A to point genitals.
We spoke to Knick Moore and Max, two veteran zookeepers, who helped explain what it's like to walk a thin and occasionally sticky line working with animals.
In case Google ever comes up with a way to send emails into the past, I'm telling Past Me to listen up, because there are some important things you need to be aware of.
That little extra line is just one more way for Hollywood to trick you into handing them your wallet.
Apparently, whenever a Hollywood writer is stuck on a script, they watch a random episode of this obscure TV show, filter it through an eight ball of cocaine, and call it a day.
Like so many other things we do to keep ourselves entertained online, adorable animal videos sometimes come with a dark side.
I've never understood online gaming: I got into games to get away from people, now you want me to voluntarily share my lush fantasy worlds with some guy named Dave? Up yours, Dave.
Here are just a few inventive methods that practitioners of the paranormal have developed to distinguish themselves from their peers.
Need to give your brain a rest? Just watch a few of these and you'll probably achieve nirvana.
'CGI can eat a d*ck.' - Christopher Nolan and Tom Cruise (probably)
Good intentions can easily go awry. And once they do, all they're good for is paving some particularly hellacious roads.
Growing up we were taught to abide by the golden rule: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
Growing up we were taught to abide by the golden rule: Do unto others as you would have them do unto...
This devilishly handsome mumble-puppet might just be television history's most unreliable narrator.
It turns out that some of the lessons Captain Planet taught are about as useful as telling people to wipe their butts with recycled uranium fuel rods.
We're not saying that we should forgive all these people. Just that even the blind squirrel gets the nut sometimes, you know?
These five classic films won the public's hearts on the strength of their openings, and we've kind of chosen to politely forget all the mediocrity in the second reel.
We spoke to Hana, an instructor who has braved countless times what can only be described as Cthulhu's living room, and lived to tell the tale.
We spoke to six different victims of domestic abuse -- male and female -- and found out that lots of these cases don't look like the plots of Lifetime movies.
Judging from the news, the world is like a disaster movie, only without the last few scenes where everybody escapes.