When it comes to movie directors, the lack of sanity can be quite striking.
We're reasonably sure that the most ingenious 'video game plot' these days is the one designed to scam you.
Except for the Pastafarian afterlife, because who wouldn't want to eat noodles for eternity?
Still more thrilling than the presidential election.
Most these movies could've been solved in minutes by a trip to the Dollar General.
You jerks! I said this was going to happen.
These cartoonish, over-the-top evil schemes that are still less horrifying than their real-world counterparts.
One hopes that when nations refer to their bleak history, they mean centuries ago, and not 'earlier this morning.'
Spoiler alert: Actors are not the same people as the roles they play.
The prominent philosophers The Righteous Brothers once warned...
Whoever decided to turn animals that want to eat us into cute snuggle bugs is a brave, brave soul.
Start hoarding now, folks.
Children and entertainment mix about as well as alcohol and prescription meds -- which, incidentally, often end up being their primary diet.
Disney's story ends what Tolkien started.
Many of the byzantine horrors we see today were thought up by writers standing in line to buy a new mattress -- or something equally boring and mundane.
The one things today's fans seem to have forgotten: It's about the journey.