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Real Name: Jordan Breeding
Member Since: February 4th, 2014
Columnist for Cracked and a contributor to McSweeney's, Paste Magazine, The Hard Times, Ranker, Looper, Modern Rogue, and more. I'd put something funnier here, but I'd really like for you to hire me. Will joke for food.
Just about everything I've written (including over 100 Cracked articles) can be found here: https://thejordanbreedingblog.wordpress.com/2017/03/22/portfolio/
Feel free to scream at me at email@example.com.
If you can’t be big, be smart.
Remembering all the times Hollywood big shots bowed to the whims of the masses.
Some people know you can only break the rules by following them to the letter.
It's hard to take your ancestors seriously after you realize how they all smelled.
Modern folks are so sensitive ...
Tourists are just the worst.
Money, money, money.
It's a little disconcerting how many of these boundaries were drawn with less care than your average Bowsette hentai.
How do you adapt a TV show for another country? Here's some ideas.
Kill your darlings.
How hard can it be to make a good 'Star Wars' movie?
There are a few things that are cool and original and SHOULD have been copied, but weren't.
Some kids' movies are really creepy when you devote more than a second of thought to them.
On the surface, Qui-Gon Jinn seemed to be a logical warrior. But dig a little deeper, and you find yourself wondering how he even became a Jedi Master.