Cracked Archive - News

Another Mysterious Monolith Randomly Appears, Vanishes in Romania
At this point, it's got to be aliens.
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- By Carly Tennes
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16
'Umbrella Academy' Star Elliot Page Comes Out As Transgender
Longtime LGBTQAI+ icon, Elliot Page, came out as transgender and non-binary.
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- By Carly Tennes
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156
So Where Are We On Legal Weed?
We have tipped the bong on America's outlook for legal marijuana.
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- By Max Mitchem
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38
Update: That Mysterious Utah Monolith Has Now Mysteriously Disappeared
This is definitely on brand for 2020.
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- By Carly Tennes
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10
6 Helping Hands From Groups You May Not Expect
Sometimes the people helping you out are the ones you didn't even think of asking.
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- By Chris Corlew
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43
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You Can Now Email A Literal Dumpster Fire Emblazoned with '2020'
A new way to air your grievances ... just in time for Festivus!
- Authors
- By Carly Tennes
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6
Breaking: 'Clifford the Big Red Dog' is a Big Red Dog, Terrifies The Internet
Come on, did we not learn anything from the whole 'Sonic the Hedgehog' fiasco?
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- By Carly Tennes
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27
Grow-Your-Own Human Meat Meal Kit 'Technically' Not Cannibalism, Makers Say
Yum?
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- By Carly Tennes
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17
Mysterious Monolith Spotted In Southern Utah Wilderness
And yes, they touched it. Repeatedly.
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- By Carly Tennes
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23
Twitter, Facebook Will Transfer Donald Trump's POTUS Accounts to Joe Biden
The end is finally near!
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- By Carly Tennes
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40
New Zealanders Are Raving Right Now
Being from New Zealand is a massive flex in 2020 -- but it doesn't have to be.
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- By Carly Tennes
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24
5 Unspoken Reasons The Holidays Suck For Millions Of Americans
There's a reason holiday movies are never about retail jobs.
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- By William Kuechenberg
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126
Chile's Protesters Just Changed Their Constitution (Pay Attention, US)
What the US can learn from the time Chile voted out fascism.
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- By Maxwell Yezpitelok
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108
'Borat 2' Star Rudy Giuliani Leads Bizarrely Surreal Press Conference
Lying, hair dye fails, and 90s films -- oh my!
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- By Carly Tennes
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56
Amazon Accidentally Reunites Ireland
Is there anything the e-commerce giant can't do?
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- By Carly Tennes
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24