[The scientist HANK PYM, also known as ANT-MAN, the superhero with the ability to shrink to tiny sizes and also communicate with ants, sits beside his phone in his studio apartment.]
They'll call. They HAVE to call. I just need to make sure I'm here, by the phone, and then they'll call, because they need me. They need my skills. They'll call. They called Iron Man, Thor, Captain America and the Hulk. I'm sure I'm next. I'm a founding member of the Avengers, for Christ's sake.
"Hey, Janet? Honey? Nick Fury didn't call while I was in the bathroom earlier, right? Like maybe he called while I was in the bathroom because he wanted me to join the Avengers and save the day but you forgot to tell me? No? OK ... OK."
That's OK, Hank. Know why? Because they'll call. Aliens have been attacking the city all day. It's only a matter of time before they call, I can feel it. I can feel it. Just be patient.
I wonder if the phone's even working.
[Sound of functioning dial tone.]
Nope. Phone works. I guess it must- OH SHIT!
"Janet? Honey? Do we have call waiting? I'm just asking because I picked up the phone to see if it was working, and I'm worried that when I picked it up, maybe Tony Stark was calling at that exact moment, and maybe if he got a busy signal he was like 'Oh, well I guess Ant-Man is busy and doesn't want to help us save the world' so maybe he hung up. Because he got a busy signal. So I'm thinking if we don't have call waiting, then I should probably just call him, right? I should just call Tony Stark and ask if he needs me and ... Oh. We do have call waiting. OK ... OK."
I should really call him anyway. I mean, why wouldn't they need me? I know we're fighting aliens, but surely they could use someone who can get just, like, SUPER fucking tiny, right? And I control all of the ants in the WORLD. When is that NOT useful? Maybe I should just send an army of ants to go mess up Captain America's shit. He wasn't even a founding member, but HE got the call. Bullshit. Maybe some ANTS will ruin his day. How about a hundred ants in your American flag BOOTS, Captain America? How about that? Haha. Yeah. You'd hate that. I wonder if- Oh, shit, a text!
"Janet, babe, stay by the main phone, I'm getting a text on my cell, this is probably it. This is almost DEFINITELY going to be a call from Thor or Captain America asking me to join the Avengers and-"