The historical truth, however, is closer to what would make that father figure lose his temper and threaten to send you to military school: adult Spartan males kept their hair long and flowing. There are even records of foreigners asking the Spartans why they loved long hair so much. Their answer was that long hair was a "natural and inexpensive form of ornament": in other words, a way to look pretty on the cheap.
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If Leonidas was around today, he'd have a Pinterest account.
And the Spartans didn't let that hair hang limp and unstyled like so many of today's uninspired long-haired men. As told by the Greek historian Herodotus, the Persian leader Xerxes sent a scout to check up on Leonidas and his men before he faced them at the Battle of Thermopylae. The scout reported that he'd seen the Spartans doing calisthenics naked and combing their hair. Xerxes laughed merrily about this, until a Spartan adviser explained that Spartans always "arranged their hair" when they were about to go to battle.
The text doesn't specify exactly what he meant by "arrange," but given that curling irons and Hot Buns were not yet available to mankind, it probably referred to tying their hair in thick braids to make it more manageable while fighting. I'm not sure if any of the Spartans were braiding each other's hair, but I hope so, because nothing would send terror into the hearts of your enemies like realizing you give so few fucks that you don't mind them seeing you act like a 9-year-old at a sleepover.