The children have 11 different mothers, and Hatchett seems completely confused about how it got to that point. As he told reporters at the time, "It just happened." (Hey, Tennessee, that abstinence-only education you have might not be working out so great.) And for those who might have noticed that he seems pretty young to have that many kids: He had four in the same year. Twice.
But the saga of Des Hatchett and his super sperm was not over yet. Three years later he was back in court, although this time it wasn't for failing to pay child support for his 21 children.
It was for failing to pay it for 30 of them.
Thinkstock Images/Stockbyte/Getty Dear Mr. Hatchett, please accept this condom. Sincerely, Cracked
That's right: Despite claiming during the 2009 case that he was done having children, somehow nine more appeared in three years. Although, to be fair, that doesn't mean they were all born during that time. When his earlier case made the news, Hatchett was concerned more women who had given birth to his children would find him. Apparently, they did.
In the end, these women were fighting more for the principle of the thing than for money. Because the father of their children was only making minimum wage, and it had to be split 30 ways, some of the mothers were entitled to only $1.49 a month.
Genghis Khan's Boning Populated Entire Countries
But the ultimate baby daddy of all time has to be Genghis Khan. Despite being more famous for his Mongol hordeing than his Mongol whoring, Genghis might have more descendants than any other person in history.
In the early 1200s, Genghis started conquering shit. It turned out he was really good at it and soon his empire stretched from Korea to Eastern Europe. And every time he conquered a new tribe, he took at least one of their women as a bride. He also usually killed many, if not most of the men, meaning that there were suddenly a lot fewer people to pass on their genes in any given region.
Erin Cadigan/iStock/Getty Images This guy is going to be a worse father than Des Hatchett.
Back in 2003, geneticists discovered that a shocking number of men in central Asia had nearly identical Y-chromosomes. Since that chromosome is passed from father to son and hardly changes over time, it is easy to tell who is whose daddy. All these men, some 16 million of them, had the same male ancestor about 800 years ago. And who was running all over central Asia killing off other men and having all the sex at about that time? Genghis Khan.
Rachel Fox/iStock/Getty Images They invented area codes just so he could have hoes in different ones.
We have no idea how many wives and kids Genghis had, but it must have been pretty ridiculous. And his sons and grandsons carried on the tradition, with some of them having 100 kids themselves.
So just how many people might be able to call Genghis grandpa? Back in 2003, 8 percent of Central Asian males were related to him and 0.5 percent of the world's men in total. If we assume he has as many female descendants as guys, a full 1 percent of the 7 billion people in the world today are here thanks to the Khan's epic sex life.
Kathy wrote a very funny book called FUNERALS TO DIE FOR and you can buy it here. Or follow her on Facebook, Tumblr, and Twitter.
For more from Kathy, check out 5 Reasons 'Traditional Marriage' Would Shock Your Ancestors and 6 Ways The Decision To Not Have Kids Messes With Your Head.
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