It's a little puzzling, though, because Police Squad! and Naked Gun are pretty much the exact same thing: a hilarious, Zucker, Abrahams, and Zucker (ZAZ) spoof of police procedurals starring Leslie Nielsen as Lt. Frank Drebin. Why, then, did the series last only six episodes before getting canned by ABC? The answer to that is so stupid, it sounds like a line that would be said in the actual show: ABC President of Entertainment Tony Thomopoulos went on record to say that the network canceled Police Squad! because, "The viewer had to watch it to appreciate it."

ABC
"We had to bring an end to this madness!"

Now, I am willing to admit that ZAZ's signature style of comedy (also seen in, say, Airplane!) has always been more visual than verbal, making it impossible to just put Police Squad! on in the background and still enjoy it. You actually have to sit down and pay close attention to it to get all the jokes, and that's really not how television used to work.

ABC
For one, TV shows used to have a lot more zebras in hats than they do now.

Not that long ago, television was a lesser form of entertainment, a place where you didn't want to be challenged or to make any sort of mental effort. The reason for the show's cancellation, as idiotic as it was, is now more of a commentary on how much more demanding and observant we've become when it comes to pop culture. Then again, if you've missed all the Batmen I Photoshopped into every single pic in this entry, then maybe we haven't become as perceptive as I'd thought.

And, speaking of Batman ...

I was born a 30-year-old man, and I've only gotten older, so I never really enjoyed movies and TV shows with young main characters. Needless to say, I was reluctant to check out Young Justice, because it was a cartoon about teenage (uuugh) sidekicks from the DC universe trying to establish themselves as legitimate superheroes. But then I thought that there might be enough Batman there to make it worth my while, so one day I put it on, and then I immediately started working on a time machine so I could slap my younger self for not watching the show sooner.

Cartoon Network
"You *slap* kept me *slap* from experiencing one of the *slap* greatest superhero lines ever, you *slap* dipshit."
-me, to past me.

As it turns out, there isn't that much Batman in the show, but at the same time there is, in the sense that Young Justice feels very much like Batman: The Animated Series because of how seriously it treats the audience while dealing with some heavy subjects. You have Superboy's daddy issues, Miss Martian's borderline-body dysphoria, Red Arrow's entire story arc -- oh, and that fucked-up Halloween episode. All in all, Young Justice is one of those rare, beautifully written, beautifully animated cartoons that really anyone can enjoy. And that's pretty much why it was canceled in 2013.

During an interview with Kevin Smith, Batman: TAS writer Paul Dini explained that Cartoon Network ended Young Justice because it didn't like the type of people it was attracting, namely the penisly challenged. Dini claims to have actually heard executives say, "We do not want girls watching this show," which was a problem because, as it turned out, women made up a significant chunk of Young Justice's audience.

Cartoon Network
And even if they didn't, that'd still be an incredibly fucked-up thing to say.

The studio's reasoning was that older female viewers would either a) not buy Young Justice toys or b) demand the WRONG Young Justice toys, like official Batgirl tampons or something. What actually pisses me off the most, though, is not the economically nonsensical sexism but rather that Cartoon Network saw Young Justice, probably one of the greatest animated shows of the last few years, as just a vehicle to sell toys. It's like telling someone to make you Cars and then complaining that you got Up instead.

After being put on the spot by Whedon, the studio head decided that, if he had to choose immediately, he had no choice but to cancel the show. But the thing is that ... he really didn't have to choose then. He was well within his rights to pat Whedon on the head and tell him that The WB would get back to him whenever the fuck they felt like getting back to him. What would Joss do then? He couldn't take Angel to another network, and he sure as hell wouldn't shut down production on it himself, because all he wanted to do was get his crew some job security.

See, up until then, The WB always waited until the last second to renew Angel, which forced the show's staff to turn down other gigs for a possibility of maybe working on another theoretical season of What If Philip Marlowe Was A Vampire? To deny dozens of people some peace of mind because a show's creator didn't fall to his knees and worship your tiny cock was, ironically, a huge dick move.

The WB
Now, if he had asked Whedon to kiss his feet?
That might have been a different story.

The WB did eventually admit that canceling Angel was a mistake, but their decision still robbed us of the show's sixth season, which was supposed to be something like "Angel in The Road Warrior."

I also really like that it is one of the few shows that don't take place in California or New York.

A&E
I don't even care that there are probably five murders and three rapes being committed
in this picture. Wyoming is goddamn beautiful.

To top it off, the show had some smart socio-economic commentary about Native Americans, and speaking of people who were needlessly fucked over by rich white men: In 2014, despite three very strong seasons, Longmire fans were shocked to discover that A&E was canceling the show, and that THEY were the reason why.

According to the network, the problem was that their viewers were too old, and the network wanted to attract a younger audience. They probably also barely stopped themselves from adding: "It's really our fault for not having at least one Indian on the show have magic powers and fight crime in his spare time."

A&E
Which is bullshit, because what about Hector and his superpower of punching assholes' teeth out with his fists?

Let's be clear: Longmire had a viewership of 5.6 million at the time (which was lower than the previous season but only by a bit), so ratings were not the problem. The problem was that too many of those viewers were over 50, and the network worried that they wouldn't be able to market anything to them other than Bay Rum, blue hair dye, and Youths Proximity Alarms.

A&E later tried to backtrack, saying that Longmire was canceled because of a dispute over the show's ownership, but nobody really bought it, because, as the network was so eager to point out earlier, the show's fans weren't born yesterday. Fortunately, though, this story actually has a happy ending, as Longmire has since found a new home over on Netflix, where, judging by its steady ratings, it'll continue to help your parents "chill" for the foreseeable future.

A&E
"You're welcome."