I'll just surmise the guy's full explanation as, "I made a thing that can do it" and leave it at that. The more fun explanation is the one he gave for why he did it -- the purpose of the whole thing:
The Pirate Cinema proposes a way of perceiving the film as a digital stream, or rather streams spread worldwide. In other words, The Pirate Cinema proposes to watch the films again through the logic of cables (which is unique to each connection and location).
The guy wants you to watch movies like a cable. And not Cable from the X-Men. He means wires and shit. He wants you to be a cable. I guess to make a larger point about the suffering we put cables through? About how cables can never watch more than a second of a movie at a time and how that sucks for them? I don't know. All I know is that the resulting stream feels like I'm riding a motorcycle through a series of portals that run through different movie theaters playing different movies.
I really wish I had a picture of me riding a motorcycle through a series of portals
that run through different movie theaters playing different movies.
You might also notice there's something a little ... off about the montage of clips: there's no porn. You'd think if you were to tap directly into the brain of an illegal torrenting service, there would be balls flapping over here and tits swinging over there, but that's not the case. That's most likely because even in the seedy, underground world of torrenting, mainstream Hollywood hits are still a bigger draw than boobs. But if all you want out of your Internet experience is boobs, well you're just like the many millions of Internet pervs whose, let's say, creative porn search queries can be found on ...
PornMD.com: Where Real Porn Search Terms Are Live Streamed for the World to See
Look, I can get all verbose and describe in vivid (and no doubt hysterical) detail all the wonderful, seedy, fantastic, and disgusting reasons PornMD.com is one of the very best sites on the Internet. I can explain to you why PornMD perfectly encapsulates the premise of this column. I can get really deep and philosophical about it, too. I can draw a lot of parallels and make interesting comparisons and try to explain how and why this site is the definitive website to visit if you want to tap into the core of what the Internet is thinking at any given time.
I can do all that, but I won't.
This is all you need to know: PornMD.com is a search engine run by and specifically for all the websites owned by PornHub.com. One of the features of the site is a live stream of all the search terms people from all over the world are typing to find the porn that's right for them. I watched the stream for exactly one hour. Most of the terms were run-of-the-mill porn terminology. Others, though ... they were a bit more specific. This is the best of what I saw:
Bukakke shoot turns violent
I have a wife (NOTE: I'm pretty sure the dude who typed this felt like he was being tempted by Pornhub and was trying to remind Pornhub that he's a faithful, married man.)
Asian street meat anal
He keeps cumming (NOTE: Sounds like a line from a panicked 911 call.)
Strap on fight
Pets quarters of women
Crying please stop
Jerk off encouragement
Eyebrow shave compilation
Pussy in ant hill
I could have clicked on any of these search terms and seen what they would have linked me to, but I never did. Why would I? Why would I ruin the mental images these terms spark? I'd rather laugh trying to imagine what kind of porn "Mormon Garments" and "Crying please stop" brings up, than be disappointed/mortified by the actual results.
Luis is sitting in his room of wall-to-wall TVs, and he's watching you. He's watching you all. In the meantime, you can find him on Twitter and Tumblr.
For more from Luis, check out What 5 Internet Celebrities Did After They Got Famous and 4 Obnoxious Behaviors The Modern World Made Worse.
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