The cast members who had all stuck around since First Class had to sign all-new contracts to appear in this, and Jennifer Lawrence has stated that she "... kind of fucked [herself]" by doing so. That's what you want to hear when you're desperately trying to fit your franchise into the Disney mold! Then there's how even the writer/director admits that it's a loose remake of an X-Men plot from a film that came out 13 years ago, which he'd already messed up.

And then came the delays, as the movie had its release pushed back over a year to get a bunch of reshoots done and to rework the third act. Then it got pushed back five more months because the trailer did really well in China and they want it to have a better shot there. Meanwhile, all we have to go on is this trailer, aka a montage of scenes that seem to have been collected from better X-Men films:

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Then we got Kingsman: The Golden Circle, which was OK. I didn't dislike it, but by the end, I was ready for a break from the Kingsman cocktail of self-aware spy tropes. And apparently, I wasn't the only one, as Kingsman 2 didn't make back its budget in the U.S., which is usually a signal that a blockbuster franchise needs to pump the brakes. You know, maybe take a step back, try to get a sense of what made the original work.

Or they could go full steam ahead and launch an expanded universe of spinoffs that no one is asking for.

A third movie is coming early next year, and hey, at least we're getting Colin Firth and Taron Egerton back, as they have great chemistry together and this would give them the opportunity to cap off the "Harry Hart-Eggsy relationship." Only we're not. Egerton said that he would not be returning as the lead for this one. It turns out it's a prequel set in the 1910s.

They are apparently planning to then immediately turn around and shoot a Kingsman 3, maybe, if Fox doesn't pull the plug. Will Egerton be in that one? Who knows. There's no indication he's signed for it. There's also talk of an eight-hour Kingsman TV show and a Statesmen spinoff based around the American team in the second movie -- which, again, wasn't exactly a hit. They seem convinced audiences are starving for any content served under the Kingsman label. If nothing else, I guess you have to admire their optimism?

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Then there was the weird news about Alec Baldwin playing Bruce Wayne's father as a Donald-Trump-like character, meaning we'd be subjected to yet another toothless, sterile parody of our dumb president, only this time in the middle of a Batman film? And then he dropped out two days later? And finally, we got to hear a delightful tale about extras being locked inside of a subway car and being forced to pee on the tracks, in gross violation of union rules and human decency. What the hell was going on over there?

So you're adding all of that to the fact that it's arguably a misguided premise in the first place. Remember, classic villains have the advantage of showing up, chewing scenery, then disappearing. The Joker is only in The Dark Knight for 30 minutes or so of the runtime, he's only talking for about 10 of those. It seems like common sense that this wouldn't be a "more is better" situation, but I guess we're all going to find out, whether we want to or not.

Daniel Dockery is a writer/editor for Cracked. He truly loves movies, especially the ones that have John Wick in them. Check out his Twitter if you have a spare second.

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