15 Gifts That Don't Require Shipping For Late Bums

15 Gifts That Don't Require Shipping For Late Bums

This piece was written by the Cracked Shop to tell you about products that are being sold there.

You messed up. You put off your gift shopping, and now here it is, Christmas Eve, and Jingle All the Way-ing it during a pandemic is strongly ill-advised. Don't panic: Just because you crapped the bed doesn't mean you have to lie in it. Just send a digital gift instead. These gifts don't require shipping, so they'll arrive whenever you schedule them, and they're probably less expensive than whatever you were gonna get. Less wasteful, too. Yeah. Now that we've got your speech figured out, take a look:

The Canon DSLR Photography A-Z Course

MSRP: $199

Sale Price: $10.99 (94% off)

Help any Canon user on your list get familiar with their camera so they don't just lean on the autofocus.

The Ultimate Graphic Design Bootcamp Certification Bundle

MSRP: $925

Sale Price: $29 (96% off)

This five-course bundle will introduce the artist on your list to graphic design theory and teach them how to design logos, webpages, fursonas,* and more.

*Fursonas not explicitly covered, probably.

Hollywood Art Institute Photography Course & Certification

MSRP: $2,595

Sale Price: $19 (99% off)

If your shutterbug loved one is a little beyond Canon, get them this course from the Hollywood Art Institute, who probably know a thing or two about getting people ready for their close-ups.

Fitness Ally Premium AI Powered Workouts: 1-Yr Subscription

MSRP: $59

Sale Price: $19.99 (66% off)

We all need a workout buddy, but it can't be you right now. Instead, Fitness Ally's AI will help your workout buddy count their reps, improve their workout track, and more, so it feels like you're right there. In fact, Allie might be better than you. Try not to get jealous of Allie.

YogaDownload Unlimited: 1-Yr Subscription

MSRP: $119

Sale Price: $29 (75% off)

Treat your yogi to on-demand access to thousands of yoga and fitness classes, because the way things are going, achieving zen might require every single one.

BetterMe Home Workout & Diet: Lifetime Subscription

MSRP: $1,200

Sale Price: $39.99 (96% off)

BetterMe is an all-in-one workout and nutrition app to help people take complete control over their health. Just make sure to emphasize that the recipient is perfect the way they are before you hit "send."

Omvana Meditation App: 1-Yr Subscription

MSRP: $59

Sale Price: $39.99 (33% off)

Give the gift of nirvana! Well, maybe not exactly, but this meditation app will help anybody get into a productive mindfulness practice.

Knowable Audio Learning Platform: Lifetime Subscription

MSRP: $249

Sale Price: $59.99 (75% off)

Learn something new literally every day with Knowable! This audio learning platform offers lectures from more than 200 leading experts on topics covering technology, business, and much, much more. Your most insufferable friend is about to get a lot worse, and you're going to support them.

Wine Insiders

MSRP: $300

Sale Price: $85 (71% off)

Wine Insiders is sort of like the Illuminati of wine, except they're all nice enough to share it with us. They also don't sacrifice anyone (as far as we know). They just curate tasty, affordable wine lists and mail the wine to people. This is actually nothing like the Illuminati, now that we think about it.

Winc Wine Delivery

MSRP: $155

Sale Price: $93.99 (39% off)

"More wine!" they say. "Okay," you respond as you go and book 12 bottles of wine for less than $9/each.

Mondly: Lifetime Subscription

MSRP: $2,199

Sale Price: $99.99 (95% off)

Mondly is one of the top language learning apps in the world, using easily accessible, bite-size lessons to teach practical vocabulary in no time so your friends never end up with a meal they didn't want halfway across the world.

CuriosityStream HD Plan: Lifetime Subscription

MSRP: $250

Sale Price: $149.99 (40% off)

CuriosityStream is the streaming home of some of the world's top documentaries. Give it to your friends or crazy uncle who needs educating.

The Social Distancing Lifetime Subscription Bundle

MSRP: $744

Sale Price: $199

Price Drop: $179 (75% off)

Being stuck at home sucks, but it sucks a little less with this bundle that includes Rosetta Stone (the gold standard of language learning), 12min micro book library, and more.

Instaread Book Summaries: Lifetime Subscription

MSRP: $450

Sale Price: $199.99 (55% off)

For the wannabe bookworm on your list who just wants to say they've read books, not actually read them, Instaread distills thousands of New York Times bestsellers into text and audio files designed to be consumed in a single bathroom break. Two at most, depending on diet.

Babbel Language Learning: Lifetime Subscription

MSRP: $399

Sale Price: $199 (50% off)

Babbel is the world's top-grossing language learning app and winner of several awards. If somebody wants to learn a new language, Babbel will help them do it anywhere, anytime. It's a great companion to Instaread for the friend who hates fiber.

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