You see, here's the paradox of the real world: nobody will give you a job unless you have experience, and you can't get experience unless you have a job. This Catch-22 will seem even more puzzling when you realize that almost two hundred million Americans somehow managed to get jobs, including the 18-year old shirt-folder at Hollister who neatly folded your resume up before firing it into the trash.
Unfortunately, your C+ philosophy paper on Zeno's paradoxes will not help you solve this real world dilemma. Fortunately, we can tell you the secrets to increase your likelihood of finding work.
1. You have to know somebody to become somebody. Just ask Ivanka Trump, Stephanie McMahon or George W. Bush. "But I don't know any of these people," you say. "After four years of college, the only people I know are potheads, alcoholics, and that exchange student who could belch the Russian National Anthem." Hey, it could be worse; the only person you know could be James Van Der Beek, who will sneak in through your bedroom window every night to lament the fact that Tom Cruise stole his girlfriend.
2. There's no such thing as a free lunch, but there is such a thing as getting someone's lunch for free for a year. Sometimes, you just have to suck it up and work as an unpaid intern to get experience. There's absolutely no shame in that. Just ask your parents, in between their rumblings about how it's maybe time they started charging you rent to move back into the same crappy room you couldn't wait to move the hell out of four years ago.
3. Go where the jobs really are. If things get really desperate, you could always outsource yourself to Asia and earn 30 Malaysian ringgits per week manufacturing "Don't Mess With Texas" shot glasses. Or you could earn thousands of dollars per year teaching English in Japan even though the only Japanese word you think you know is "Pokemon". Either way, you'll probably still wind up moving back in with your parents by age 24, but at least you'll have learned the Japanese word for "Hepatitis".