Top Picks 09.29.09: 8-Bit Hotties and Moms' Crushes

Some of the best stuff from around the web and the Mirth Canal.


Top Eight 8-Bit Hotties: [Asylum]

DOB was upset he didn't make this list of men your mom's have crushes on: [lemondrop]

7 Most Amazing One Take Video Clips: [Neatorama]

The 100 Greatest Youtube Clips in 4 Minutes: [Youtube.Comedy]

The Eiffel Tower is so much more than a monument in Paris: [College Humor]

Family Guy goes Disney: [Huffington Post]

Be your own Daniel-san in Amateur Ninja: [Adult Swim]

Buy Cracked Editor David Wong's book right now: [John Dies at the End]

"What's that scent you're wearing? It's... interes-" "It's jizz.": [The Frisky]
Thanks to Susannah via email.

"Alright, got that roof off the house. Let's go grab a beer." "Frank, are you sure we got the right house?":[Fark]

Insane surfing wipeouts: [Uncoached]

"Hi, I'm looking for Mr... Uh... Horse Dick?": [I Am Bored]

Is this really what dating was like in 1987?: [Boing Boing]
Thanks to Man with Beard in the Mirth Canal.

Top 10 Jay-Z Disses: [Ask Men]

7 Ways the Internet is Ruining Your Life: [coed]

The National Science Foundation Love to Surf Porn and Cost Tax Payers Money: [Unpolitcal Mag]

5 X-Men Spin-offs they Need to Make: [Mania]

50 Extraordinary and Attractive Billboards: [10steps]

Double the Fun: 100 Sexy Photos of Twins: [Gunaxin]

10 Hints that Stewie is Gay: [Liquid Generation]

South Park invades real-life, again: [YouTube]
Thanks to Mongo in the Mirth Canal.

Your favorite video game characters on Facebook: [College Humor]

Lisa Marie sure has a lot of faith in her pigtails: [Gorilla Mask]

11 Things Google Should Atone for on Its 11th Anniversary: [11Points]

20 Disturbing Family Photos: [The Chive]

Conan gives it his all... and injures himself: [Huffington Post]

And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: probably the most specific page in the entire database.
Submitted by KellstErik in the Mirth Canal.

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20 Pictures of Animals Being Gay: [Big Stupid Idiot]

Song: "The Wrong Hole": [College Humor]

25 Pictures of People Who Dressed Themselves in the Dark: [The Chive]

Best Robot Chicken moments featuring giant robots: [Adult Swim]

Human Tetris: [Huffington Post]

There might actually be a computer movie cooler than Wargames: [Computer Beach Party]
Thanks to MC via email.

Top 10 Action Babes: [Ask Men]

"Was I just in a wreck? Awesome. Time to masturbate":[Fark]

True Life: I Answered a Craigslist Ad: [lemondrop]

Baffling. Just... baffling: [I Am Bored]

Who needs sexy clothes when you have sexy paint?: [coed]

Who thought the dance squad would be hotter than the cheerleaders?: [Uncoached]

Honda introduces the Segway's retarded cousin: [The U3-X]
Thanks to Vlad the Impala in the Mirth Canal.

Believe it or not, Ian Fortey does work outside of Cracked: Inside the Mind of a Cow Sex Trial Jurist: [Asylum]

4 People Who Make Dexter Look Like a Model Citizen: [Mania]

Wallace and Gromit's Latest Adventure: [Gunaxin]

Which Movie Hero Are You?: [Liquid Generation]

Vanessa Raia knows how to wear a tie properly: [Gorilla Mask]

Finally, a site for sports fans and chronic masturbators: [Sporno]
Thanks to Remora in the Mirth Canal.

11 Most Ironically Banned Books of All Time: [11Points]

Insane basketball shot: [Huffington Post]

From top-tier NFL quarterback to "that guy" in the back of the photo: [College Humor]

And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: A list of films that you'll never ever get to see.
Submitted by polancoj16 in the Mirth Canal.

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23 Reasons to Go to Oktoberfest: [The Chive]

The 13 Funniest SNL Digital Shorts: [Huffington Post]

Awkward family moments: [College Humor]

A new PSA from Will Ferrell: [Huffington Post]

"Did you bring protection?" "Yes, I always keep kebabs on me. You know, just to be safe.": [lemondrop]

"After you destroy this crucifix, we shall feast on the Smarties inside... and then have cake and ice cream.": [I Am Bored]

The Venture Bros. panel from Dragon*Con: [Adult Swim]

The 10 Worst Movies to Open at Number One: [coed]

10 Non-Pornographic Pictures Bob Saget Has Definitely Masturbated To: [Uncoached]

Is your hair turning women off? Probably: [Ask Men]

"Freeze! You're under arre- Hey, is that a Wii?":[Fark]

Charlize Theron gets naked in public: [Asylum]

The greatest Half Life 2 mod. Ever: [YouTube]
Thanks to TinyPenguininja in the Mirth Canal.

Who'd win the fight between Superman and the Hulk?: [Mania]

One Queen and Eleven Presidents: [Unpolitical Mag]

What a lovely... everything you have, Jennifer Copeland: [Gorilla Mask]

A very disturbing set of videos: [YouTube]
Thanks to The Moose in the Mirth Canal.

10 of the Funniest South Park Songs: [Liquid Generation]

11 Photos Ruined By Animals Doing Nasty Things: [11Points]

Girl or sex doll?: [The Frisky]
Thanks to Wendy via email.

11 Types of Strangers: [College Humor]

15 Reasons Why Longcat is Inducted into the Geek Hall of Fame: [Geekpad Show]

And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: Women in refrigerators. Sadly, it wasn't what our sexually depraved minds were hoping for.
Submitted by Demos182 in the Mirth Canal.

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10 of the Craziest Awards Crashers: [Liquid Generation]

Top 10 It's Always Sunny Moments: [College Humor]

Blondes maybe easy targets, but this one killed an alligator. What the hell have you done today?: [Asylum]

The most compelling argument in favor of gay marriage: [Huffington Post]

Viva Caligula: "You know, just on my way to an orgy, murdering people and junk. Just another day.": [Adult Swim]

Who are the most influential men of 2009? Ask Men has the answer: [Ask Men]

People laugh at our anti-nature campaign. But this monkey pushed a woman off a cliff. Fuck that:[Fark]

10 Unbelievable Videos of Little Kids Getting Owned (It's not what you think, NAMBLA): [Uncoached]

Sherri Gulley's school uniform doesn't fit quite right: [Gorilla Mask]

This is why you don't fuck with gamers. Ever: [Gizmodo]
Thanks to revdevsadvct in the Mirth Canal.

What romantic comedies think about men: [lemondrop]

The cruelest photo on the planet: [I Am Bored]

6 People Who Could Play Bilbo Baggins: [Mania]

Amazon Hijacked: 10 Funniest Review Threads: [Telegraph]
Thanks to Mike via email.

10 Dumbest People Who Deliver Our News: [Veto Corleone]

"My goatee isn't stupid.": [College Humor]

We finally found some Ghostbusters hotter than Bill Murray: [The Chive]

Gladstone claims it's a snake with a leg. Seanbaby maintains that it just has a mutated dick. Brockway wants to get it drunk: [The Sun]
Thanks to RuneJoker in the Mirth Canal.

10 Craziest Baseball Rules from the Past: [Jock and Balls]

Jay Leno mocks children for not reading, messes up plot to Hamlet: [Huffington Post]

We thought we were going to be seeing actual whale tails. Still, we weren't disappointed: [coed]

11 Real Names of Rappers: [11Points]

And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: This tree ain't nobody's property.
Submitted by DNASnatcher in the Mirth Canal.

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Surfing dogs. Fucking gnarly, bro: [Asylum]

A site for zombie lovers everywhere: [Zombies or Not]

Five secretly awesome things you didn't know Patrick Swayze accomplished in his life: [Ask Men]

A sneak peek at Titan Maximum, the story of five idiots trying to save a moon of Saturn: [Adult Swim]

Awesome and up close pictures of tornadoes:[Fark]

10 Most Ridiculous Romance Novel Titles: [Whip It Out]

15 Awesome Old School Photos of Ah-nold: [Uncoached]

"Th- That's not a bear." "Just roll with it.": [lemondrop]

5 Ways Wolverine Could've Been Sharper: [Mania]

Yes, DOB, Kanye West is retarded: [YouTube]
Thanks to BondFiction in the Mirth Canal.

One man Michael Jackson cover, a capella: [College Humor]

Where retarded tweets go to die: [Twaxed]
Thanks to Tyrone via email.

Swaim kept saying he had evidence that being an elk would rule. We never thought he'd be right: [I Am Bored]

18 Photos of the weirdest competition on Earth: [The Chive]

11 Hidden Secrets in Fight Club: [11Points]

21 Failed Twitter Hashtags: [Geekpad Show]

10 Best Athletes Who Are Bad: [Liquid Generation]

Don't barf, don't barf, don't ba- Holy shit!: [College Humor]

Marshmallow Torture: [Vimeo]
Thanks to Ripper in the Mirth Canal.

And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: Need a good book about bagpipes? Look no further, friends.
Submitted by nchammer326 in the Mirth Canal.

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Is it a goth? An emo? A terrible Halloween costume? Or is it...a ZOMBIE?: [Zombies or Not]

11 Best Tranny Moments in Entertainment: [11Points]

11 Greatest Superhero Bromances: [Comics Alliance]

A review of the sexercise ball! By an actual woman! (NSFW): [lemondrop]

Adult Swim serves Hitler a fresh dish of hatin': [Adult Swim]

10 Incredibly Nasty NASCAR Crashes: [Uncoached]

Megan Fox says she won't appear in any nude scenes or sex tapes. We can all stop caring about her now: [Asylum]

6 Truly True Blood Moments from Season 2: [Mania]

Of all the things South Africa doesn't get right, we figured broadband Internet wouldn't be on that list: [BBC]
Thanks to ralf23 in the Mirth Canal.

How Joe Wilson interacts with young interns: [Unpolitical Mag]

If this doesn't tug at your heartstrings it's probably because you don't have a heart: [College Humor]

Apparently someone in D.C. forgot to check their calendar today:[Fark]

We've never heard of Humping Guy before, but we like his style: [Humping Guy 2: College Freshmen]
Thanks to Maria via email.

10 People Who Made it Cool to be Drunk: [Big Stupid Idiot]

Is Nick McDonell the next Hunter S. Thompson?: [Ask Men]

The greatest keytar player ever: [I Am Bored]

10 Jolliest Chick Bullriders: [Liquid Generation]

You know what? We'll pass on that birthday invite: [College Humor]

Can Dokken defeat this chicken breast?: [YouTube]
Thanks to Disco Stu in the Mirth Canal.

Great, just what the world needs: another Internet meme: [Huffington Post]

7 Shattered Objects That Shouldn't Be: [The Chive]

And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: In case you ever need to look up a catgirl, now you know where to go.
Submitted by TheAlmightyCoxy in the Mirth Canal.

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Conan O'Brien: demolition expert: [Huffington Post]

Pole dancing dolls and cussing cats: [Asylum]

Australians have huge toilets, apparently:[Fark]

We'd let her kick our ass any day of the week: [lemondrop]

Fantasy Telemarketer is cold-calling your name: [Adult Swim]

Will Draw Anything for $2: [WDA]
Thanks to Vermillion in the Mirth Canal.

Marvel's New Fall Line-Up: [College Humor]

20 Awesome Divorce Cakes: [The Chive]

"Those elk won't get out of the street." "K, we'll talk to them... hey guys, you mind moving?" "Fuck you, copper!": [11Points]

Where to go if you need the scoop on the bathroom you're about to use. Is there an app for this?: [Ask Men]

A Tribute to Hot Girls Draped on Cars: [Uncoached]

The Former Careers of UFC Fighters: [coed]

5 Characters that Embody the Spirit of Labor Day: [Mania]

Just a few reasons we avoid Wal-Mart: [People of Wal-Mart]
Thanks to Jes via email.

"I bet you can't do a life-sized Harley." "Done." "Son of a-": [I Am Bored]

Looks like someone needs LifeCall: [Liquid Generation]

15 Awful Obama Tattoos: [Veto Corleone]

We're still debating if this is better than Toto's version: ["Africa" A Capella]
Thanks to VoodooTissue in the Mirth Canal.

That Jennifer Vaughn is one piece of ass. We know from experience, dude. If you know what we mean: [Gorillamask]

We're thinking anyone who has a set will avoid this place: [College Humor]

And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: Did Hungary compete in the '88 Winter Olympics?
Submitted by Quagmar in the Mirth Canal.

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Stoned cats listening to music: [The Chive]

Megan Fox lesbian kiss and Captain EO returns: [Asylum]

A few reasons why you should be watching the U.S. Open: [coed]

The best Adult Swim on-air promos: [Adult Swim]

Cute picture? Or undeniable proof of pedophile pandas: [College Humor]

11 Worst Movie Posters From the 80s: [11Points]

10 Awesome Holes-in-One: [Uncoached]

Item #332 that rednecks can blame on Obama: a shortage in demolition derby cars:[Fark]

A new way for women to make money in this hard economic climate: [lemondrop]

Beavis and Butthead return to review Extract: [Huffington Post]

Can't keep track of all the awesome stuff you don't want to miss this Fall? Don't worry, Ask Men has your back: [Ask Men]

Ben and Jerry's gay marriage themed ice cream contains chocolate covered pretzels. We did not make that up: [Ben and Jerry]
Thanks to FlyingSquid in the Mirth Canal.

Some pics to get you in the mood for Halloween: [I Am Bored]

Colleen Carrera shows us how to wear an eyepatch: [Gorillamask]

We're still trying to decide which one is hotter: [Liquid Generation]

10 Bizarre Cigarette Ads: [Retro Comedy]

An interesting way to support healthcare reform: [The Associated Press]
Thanks to reckless abrandon in the Mirth Canal.

A look back on this summer's movies: [Mania]

A new, deadly way to put on a rubber: [College Humor]

The 10 Hottest Hip-Hop Wives: [Street Level]
Thanks to Alex via email.

And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: When Kobe Bryant said he learned his crossover from God, he wasn't kidding.
Submitted by Optimus Pimp in the Mirth Canal.

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Some of the best Mr. T pictures ever: [Uncoached]

The 10 Best Family Guy Back-2-School Clips: [Adult Swim]

Tetris can alter the structure of your brain... but only after it gets the long, straight piece:[Fark]

This fat kid loves bacon. Go figure: [College Humor]

How Intimate is Too Intimate?: [lemondrop]

Some horror sequels that weren't all that terrible: [Rotten Tomatoes]

10 Catastrophic Ways Men Have Tried to Look Pretty: [Ask Men]

Disney buys Marvel and plans for Rambo 5: [Asylum]

Samurai on the Toilet: [by. Takeshi Kitano]
Thanks to PJ via email.

Glenn Beck reinforces our belief that Mormons are dirty, filthy perverts: [YouTube]
Thanks to skatfree in the Mirth Canal.

The most ridiculous fight scene ever: [I Am Bored]

The battle of the Jens versus the Angies: [Liquid Generation]

Reason #124 why we won't have children: [Huffington Post]

We're not sure if Mindi Smith really knows how to wash a car. We also don't care: [Gorillamask]

10 Songs That Will Prepare You for a Robot Uprising: [Funk Jelly]

The most terrifying banana ever: [YouTube]
Thanks to plustax in the Mirth Canal.

24 photos of people on roller coasters: [The Chive]

The 13 Sexiest Superhero Costumes: [Mania]

11 Terrible Translations for Nintendo: [11Points]

A Cracked intern: [College Humor]

101 Ridiculously Hot Redheads: [coed]

And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: A list of people who married their cousins.
Submitted by Dan the Great in the Mirth Canal.