If you were Scrooge McDuck-wealthy, you could custom order a badass danger guitar, or build the foundation for your very own A Boy and his Dog underground creep-topia. But you have wisely downgraded your expectations to a reasonable level and are frothing over "Rugrats" and "Hey Dude" coming back on the TV.
Do you want to play a guitar that feels like it might explode at any second? Try out the Pikasso Guitar! No other instrument combines joy and suspense as well as it does.
"The Pikasso has four necks and 42 strings, the tension of which puts the instrument under about as much pressure as a deep sea diver."
"Blowing smoke up his ass" wasn't just something you figuratively did to the boss. And you might want to sit down for this - but the original medical application wasn't particularly successful.
"We here at Cracked like to dredge up the past to remind you that no matter how hard you wish you lived in a previous time period, you're simply mistaken (or crazy)."