6 Adorable Spider Behaviors You Slowly Realize Are AAAAAHHH!
Objectively, we all know that, even when they look absolutely terrifying, most spiders are completely harmless. Hell, some of them don't even look like the devil threw up a nightmare: Spiders are furry, have big ol' puppy dog eyes and do adorable things like wear dew as hats. But that's not quite enough to quiet the screaming voices telling you to abandon everything and run -- just run and never stop running -- every time you walk through an errant web. So here are a few reasons you might just want to give the next spider you see a big ol' hug instead of a series of stomps followed by anxious sobbing.
Spiders are good at hugging, you see. They have oh so many arms. Tuck in close, now ...
#6. Using Perfume to Attract Lovers
We all want to smell our best for prospective mates, and Evarcha culicivora are no different. That's right: Studies have shown that even spiders prefer their mates perfumed. Despite all of their inherent alien horror, there's something kind of adorable about that, isn't there? Any creature that cares enough about making that good first impression on a member of the opposite sex is a creature we can relate to. You can just imagine the little fellas now, all clasping their little furry legs together with wide-eyed earnestness while a pretty-smelling girl comes sidling up to them.
Via Robert R. Jackson
"Man, is it hot in here, or is it just my huge spider boner?"
So what is it that makes these little debutantes go wild for each other? What is spider perfume? Maybe they rub themselves up on some pretty flowers, roll around in a field of berries, bathe in fresh spring water?
Haha, no.
It's blood. Malaria-infected blood.
Photos.com
Axe Body Spray uses basically the same ingredients.
#5. Making Music to Attract the Ladies
The serenade is the most romantic, loving, gentle and civilized form of courtship. Even our eight-legged monster friends know it. But spiders don't have acoustic guitars, or pianos, or even CDs to burn romantic mix tapes onto. So what's a lonely spider to do? Well, males of the Dictyna civica species play music for the ladies by making a series of vibrations on the female's web. So it's part mating dance, too, which we all know animals do, but the weird thing is that the music and rhythm play an important part in the wooing.
Via Dhushara.com
Know any Skynyrd?
Maybe tying music and romance together is pure anthropomorphism on our part, but songbirds, crickets and whales all do it, and we can't help but view them with an air of gentleness because of this behavior. They sing, they mate, they love.
Via Wikimedia Commons
They liquify their prey.
Of course, if the male spider plays one off-note -- makes one little misstep -- he'll be mistaken for a struggling fly. Then the female, instead of telling him he has a kind soul and then boning him on a stained futon to a Dave Matthews Band song, will charge out and devour him.
Via Jorgenlissner.dk
"Dude, she's not mad. When I asked, she said nothing was wrong."
#4. Motherly Love
Motherhood is a magical thing: Any mother would do just about anything for her own special little mucusy subcreature. You'd take a bullet for yours, suffer through sleepless nights to comfort it and perhaps even cut back on those monthly porn subscriptions just to feed it, clothe it and buy it toys. One day, maybe, God willing, you'll even grow so attached that you'll bother to give it a name and stop referring to the baby as an "it."
That's what the poets call "love."
Via Joaquin Portela
In between whole stanzas of screaming.
Turns out our human mothers don't have a lock on that shit. A spider mommy of the Stegodyphus variety very nearly starves herself just to feed her young, regurgitating every meal so all her babies get fed. She sacrifices everything: Her health, her well-being, even her life to defend her brood. It takes a lot for a thinking being to repress its own survival instincts; for a predatory animal, it is nothing short of amazing. Birds, mammals -- even turtles abandon the hell out of their young the first chance they get, and those are the ninjas that first taught us about the true bonds of friendship.
So it's pretty astounding to think of the Stegodyphus spider putting them all to shame with her intense, matronly love. But instead of Mother's Day cards and a call every Christmas, her children show their gratitude by climbing onto her abdomen as soon as they are physically able, then sinking their fangs into her belly and drinking her.
Via Pure.au.dk
"It beats ending up in a home."
It's ridiculous how much you don't like spiders. Nothing's wrong with any of these things.
ReplyLet's just take a moment & thank mother nature for not allowing the spiders to fly. But the way things are going, Im certain it's about to change.
ReplyTechnically, some can float using their webs as parachutes..
spiders sound like better parents than humans XD
Replyscythemantis knows his stuff...
ReplyThink that's bad? Keyword is "beforehand." Any other insect wouldn't even BOTHER killing you...
Replystupid spiders. why do they need all those legs for anyways?
Reply*itches all over*
ReplyDEAR GOD WHY DID I READ THIS
I love this and would love to talk to you ..... Love spiders
Reply*reads #2*
Reply*starts twitching*
I hate spiders because they are sneaky bastards, but thats because I live in an area infested with yellow sacs, cousin to the brown recluse, and they like to scuttle across the INSIDE of my drivers side window and windshield when I am driving, that is how I am going to die.
Replyalways love and like all spiders behavior because that is our true humans behavior it,s strange that human and spiders are alike
ReplyTO MANY SPIDERS
Reply...but not enough grammar lessons for you.
Maybe he just didn't finish his statement. To many spiders: What?
I was just reading through this article, when I realized I was casually masturbating the whole time. No Bullshit.
Replyummm....okaaay...
Now that you mention it, I also got hard while reading this
In defense of female spiders eating males: it's actually very rare in the wild, even the infamous "black widow," who was named for that sort of thing, has almost never been observed eating the males under natural conditions. Much more commonly, the male is allowed to hang out in her web, they groom each other and they may share food - even though he's absolutely useless to her, because his genitals break off in the mating process.
Reply Hide All See All 12 RepliesThe thing to understand is that spiders are rather competitive, and will often invade the webs of other species to steal food or just eat the owners. The genus Portia are masters of this, and even try to imitate the mating dances of their victim's species.
A female spider who spreads her eight legs for any a*****e is going to get taken advantage of. She has no reason to trust a male ever, since he could just as easily be a predator or thief in disguise. Getting the mating dance right is the only indication that he MIGHT be entering her territory with good intentions, so she needs to maintain some strict standards. Also, she's a bug, her brain is little. Once she's done having sex she's lucky to know the difference between the male and another tasty fly...but still, she usually does.
Seriously, dude....what is it with you and spiders??
I study and love animals with a particular bias towards arthropods. I find people's hatred and loathing for spiders and insects to be offensive and fight it wherever I can.
Oh, you're one of THOSE.
tbf most spiders dont realy do anything to humans and just eat the other bugs which are as annoying as hell ie flies, midges, wasps etc.
One of those...what? Seriously, I never got used to people using lazier forms of English. ESL doesn't prepare you for everything.
So What your saying is he is BEGGING her to eat him for all that time, and she finally obliges.
wow. really long.I didn't read half of that.good job!
Alright, I get the respecting and defending spiders but it really offends you when people don't like spiders? that is the stupidest thing i have ever heard
I, for one, would be happy to be devoured were my reproductive organs to detach.
Personally I think it's unique that you have acquired such knowledge. I'm an animal lover myself, but haven't opened myself to bugs much. Usually it's with much more exotic species. ^_^
I'm personally not offended that people don't know about spiders in particular, but ignorant bullshit in general irks the living s**t out of me. Spiders, sharks, crows, Muslims, gamers, fat people, Duke Nukem, the list goes on.
Spiders are not bugs.
They are arachnids.
Insects have six legs, spiders eight legs.
Watching male jumping spiders court females if f*****g adorable!
ReplyThe part about the female spider giving the male spider some nice sex before death seems like an awesome idea for an online comic.
ReplyEvery single part of this article was horrifying. All of it. I didn't see or read anything adorable.
ReplyDon't be such a puss. Spiders are cool.
And they go OUT OF THEIR WAY to kill and eat the mosquitoes carrying Malaria...I don't know how the article managed to treat that as a scary point.
Hold on a second... spiders become teenagers? I thought all insects and arachnids had very short life spans.
ReplyMost do, yes, but larger tarantulas, scorpions, millipedes and centipedes can live almost to their twenties in some cases. The longest lived actual insects include cicadas (17 years in their immature phase in some species), queen bees, ants and termites (30's) and some giant roaches (Madagascan hissers up to seven, Rhinoceros roaches over a decade!)
i'm cool with spiders and insects in general, but the pictures are a bit...disturbing. the articles don't help either.
ReplyIt was stupid of me to click on this article. The facts are normal, interesting biology, but it didn't even occur to me that a spider article would be full of horrible spider pictures.
Replyno shit.