How to Choose a Nickname [COMIC]
Basic Instructions is a twice weekly updating web comic that offers absurd advice on how to live your life. Some of those updates will be happening here on Cracked.
Previously Scott has taught us How To Retroactively Ruin a Joke and How to Argue Like an American.
Every time you voice a half-assed opinion, a kitten dies.
ReplyHere I go.
Basix Onstrictions sux!
I lik this one.
Thiz one failed.
Three down, several billion to go. WHO'S WITH ME?
Whenever the power goes out it should go out at exactly 12 so you don't have to reset your clock.
ReplyExcept for one little problem: That only works if the power goes out at 12:00 to the very second, and then comes back on within a minute.
Scott shall be spared the doomsday device this week, however I will see to it that any pets he has develop temporary allergies.
ReplyApparently I'm the only one that thinks Basic Instruction is pretty funny.
ReplyI think it's the best webcomic there is... although this one could have ended better. I expected him to get more creative than just "sir".
I like it too.
I usually don't laugh at Basic Instructions. I didn't this time either. Humor is typically required to induce laughter. This web comic is drier than a 3000 year old mummy's vagina, and half as funny.
Reply Hide All See All 4 RepliesAgreed. This blows.
Cracked needs to make a banner that says, "HUMOR IS SUBJECTIVE, YOU DOLTS!"
@Icalasari, I agree. I think a mummy's vagina would be hilarious.
I may change MY nickname to Mummy's Vagina...
Also, don't let Gashlycrumb anywhere near a museum, we now know what he's been doing with the mummy's.
Basic Instructions usually sucks but this time it was good.
Replyprobably the one millionth time somebody has commented that on a basic instructions comic
this is a stupid s**t, not funny, a*****ed, dick nosed, c**t eyed comic and i want it to stab itself in it's ass-dick-nose-face so cracked would appear at least half way c**k-tit-jew'd like it use to before this s**t came along.
Reply Hide All See All 3 Replies"c**k-tit-jew'd"? I don't think I've heard that one before.
This is funny as f**k, and you have issues
Alot. Of. Issues.
im going to be 100% honest, i usually dont like these comics, but this one was pretty good.... pretty pretty pretty good. (it could also be the wearing-off marijuana....)
Reply[INSERT "BASIC INSTRUCTIONS" IS NOT FUNNY COMMENT]
Reply Hide All See All 4 RepliesOR
[INSERT "BASIC INSTRUCTIONS" IS FUNNY THIS TIME BUT NOT USUALLY COMMENT]
[insert "pointing out the obvious" comment]
[INSERT "I AGREE, IT SUCKS" COMMENT]
OR
[INSERT "THIS IS ALWAYS s**t" COMMENT]
Just for future reference, i actually like BI and i feel there are very few misses posted on this site. Scott's site has even better ones though.
[INSERT "SOMETHING" IN "SOMETHING".]
AND/OR
[INSERT "SOMETHING ELSE" IN "SOMETHING ELSE".]
REPEAT AS DESIRED OR NECESSARY.
Say, "Whew, that was good. Cigarette?"
[INSERT INSERT-INSERT INTO 'INSERT' COMMENT]
OR
[INSERT DISK: 2 AND CLICK OK]
The comics on his site are funnier, I think because they come at you faster.
ReplyI actually really like his site for some reason...I like the self deprecating aspect of a lot of it.
Funnier than white ninja
Replywhite ninja is amazing. shut you unholy face!
I laughed.
ReplyI giggled.
Replythis s**t is not funny
ReplyEvery time I see one of these, the comments are people saying "I finally laughed!" or "A funny one, about time"
Reply Hide All See All 14 RepliesSo that means f**king all of them are good, so stop pretending they arent.
That.......... does not make sense at all.
I'm fairly certain it does make sense Tirunus..
actually it does...kinda
No, that doesn't make sense. Just because a small select few find a comic funny doesn't mean that all of them are "good." Most of them are pretty funny, a few were hilarious, the rest are meh.
It totally makes sense you f**king moron, it's one-f**king-joke-all-alone-by-itself like your-lonely-bitter-ass. Of course not everyone is going to think it is funny, s**t a lot of comic strips don't make sense all by themselves, you des**cable little s**t.
if a small minority say "finally it's funny!" every time, that means that up to that point, those people have not laughed, implying that this 1 out of all the ones they have read is funny. It doesn't mean all of them are good, and the general negative response this comic gets shows that it's not very well like among the general population of cracked readers.
has anyone on the internet understand the concept of opinions?
P.S. i love that the censoring starred out "des**cable" bacause it has "s(pi)c" in it
By "small select few" you mean the people who's comments are shown by 10s down below the article? The article intended to be funny? Funny as in what you said most of these comics are?... I'm pretty sure DancingJesus94 got it down.
Different people have different opinions. Honestly this comic started out as s**t (you know, cause of all that readin ya gotta do!). We b***hed and they made it better. The comic is now funny.
fking censor your own descable st
take the fun from the censors!
meh, you should see the half of the s**t i post that gets deleted. seriously, im not supposed to talk about it, so if you read this, check again and voila, this post is either gone or wile-E-moderator of acme internet is f**king with me.
Actually, cyphercell, it's because you aren't very nice in the comments section at all, and you show very little restraint with your language. People tend not to like sentences composed mainly of f**ks and s**ts.
Wtff? That's so idiotic. Everyone has different opinions, which no one has to hold back cause it's the f**king interwebz. Who's pretending...
Interesting - every time I see one of these, the comments ALSO are people saying how they are not funny, or sometimes these are funny but not this time.
So that means f**king none of them are good, so stop pretending they are.
We now have complete logical fallacies at the BEGINNING of this thread and the END of this thread. (Naturally mine won't last, but that's how it is right now.)
Thank god the universe is such a well-balanced thing, eh?
This one was pretty good.
ReplyDude, I finally laughed! Great job, I knew you could do it :)
ReplyThis one was pretty damn funny.
ReplyThis is the kind of stuff that would be funny coming from a stand-up comedian, but I can't really "feel" it coming from a comic. Just sayin'.
ReplyI think that may be the problem. He WAS a stand up comedian, and a really good one too.
very nice!
Reply