#9. The Fall Guy--ABC (1981-1986)
The Fall Guy was a show about a movie stunt man, who in his spare time, worked as a bounty hunter to help pay the bills. Throughout the four-season run, Colt Seavers used his incredible stuntman abilities (pretending to get punched in the face, falling into piles of cardboard boxes) to collar an impressive number of mimes and cardboard boxes.
#8. The Greatest American Hero--ABC (1981-1983)
High school teach Ralph Hinkey is given a red flying suit by aliens during a field trip to the desert. Why the aliens chose to give him an enormously powerful weapon is never explained. Its human-scale equivalent would be giving a flamethrower to a monkey, which"¦ Oh, of course. Entertainment value.
Anyway, instead of using the suit to harass women who had spurned his sexual advances, he chooses to fight crime-a more noble, if less realistic goal.
#7. The Master--NBC (1984)
The Master is the story of the first white ninja (Lee Van Cleef!), who uses his deadly martial arts training to train the second white ninja. Together they use their dark powers to roam the country in a van, helping strangers fight injustice. You know, protecting orphans from greedy land developers. Think The A-Team but with less improvised metalwork.
#6. The Misfits of Science--NBC (1985-1986)
Yet more crime-fighting, this time by a team of wacky mutants with powerfully stupid abilities. For example:
One guy is seven feet tall. That isn't his power, but it is cooler than his actual power, which is the ability to become seven inches tall.
One guy has the ability to channel electricity after an accident with some guitar amplifiers. But water causes him to short circuit.
One guy's power was-we're not kidding here-being very cold. This sounds great, except that he would melt and die if it got too warm out. He-and again, we're not fucking kidding here-spent most of his time in an ice cream truck.
One girl's power was being a young Courtney Cox, which wasn't terribly useful at the time, but opened up a lot of doors for her in later years.
#5. Out of This World--Syndicated (1987-1991)
This show was about Evie, a 13-year-old girl who developed amazing powers due to her unusual heritage. It turns out that on a lonely night 13 years before, her mother did the intergalactic horizontal tango with a visitor from another planet. This seems completely unexplainable until you realize the alien was played by Burt (motherfucking) Reynolds, at which point it just seems awesome.
According to the show's synopsis, despite being the most powerful being to walk the Earth, Evie uses her newfound abilities to do nothing more exciting than get into your typical teenage mischief, then try to get out of it again. Cleaning up after keg parties and dealing with unwanted pregnancies, we suppose.