Creating something new is hard. It's certainly much easier to patent things that have already been invented, which is exactly what these people did.
Visionary genius Terrance F. Lenahan saw an opportunity for glory in 1999 when he applied for a patent for a new way of cooking bread:
"A method of refreshening [sic] a bread product by heating the bread product to a temperature [...] between 2500 F. and 4500 F. [The bread products are] maintained at this temperature range for a period of three to 90 seconds."
"This is going to change the world."
You may recognize this process as "toasting," which is something people have been doing since the invention of bread and fire. Don't think switching up the bread involved will get you off the hook, either -- Lenahan was careful to ensure that his patent covered every form of toastable breakfast grain: