Writer and editor for niche website Cracked.com. I am definitely not a shaved bear. For more attempts at witticisms and my personal recipes for toilet wine, do follow me @cedricvoets.
Yes, Neopets Is Getting An Animated Series (No, It's Not 2004 Again) I Skeith you not. Authors By Cedric Voets Published February 12, 2020
'Resistance' Is The Next Oscar Bait Clown Movie, Which Is Now A Thing Get ready to pretend to be blown away. Authors By Cedric Voets Published February 10, 2020
Take A Peek Into The Dumbass Mind Of An Oscar Voter Academic my ass. Authors By Cedric Voets Published February 07, 2020
Behold the 19th Century (If It Was Filmed On An iPhone) Look out! That train is coming straight for us! Authors By Cedric Voets Published February 05, 2020
5 Reasons Sucky Teenage Years Are A Secret Blessing Don't want to go to a reunion to find out who failed in life? Read this instead. Authors By Cedric Voets Published February 05, 2020
The Super Bowl Ads, Ranked As Per Martin Scorsese's Definition Of Cinema A veritable art gallery. Authors By Cedric Voets Published February 03, 2020
Jump In The DeLorean With Us, We’re Headed To The 1988 Crystal Light National Aerobic Championship Pump to the jams. Authors By Cedric Voets Published January 31, 2020
Sigh, Please Don't Drink Bleach To Stave Off Coronavirus And they said the internet would make everybody smarter. Authors By Cedric Voets Published January 29, 2020
Disney Finally Runs Out Of Good Movies, Reveals Bambi Remake Well, that was fast. Authors By Cedric Voets Published January 27, 2020
Volcanoes Can Blow Our Brains Out (And Into Glass) A horrifying reminder of mortality or new fashion trend -- you decide. Authors By Cedric Voets Published January 24, 2020
Disney Is Destroying Film History By Ditching The Fox Name The Mouse Has Thanos'ed The Fox. Authors By Cedric Voets Published January 22, 2020
Some Maniac Is Still Gluing Hats To Pigeons' Heads Is no dove dome safe? Authors By Cedric Voets Published January 20, 2020
Towns Are Using Robo-Noses To Hunt Potheads You have twenty seconds to apply deodorant. Authors By Cedric Voets Published January 17, 2020
Study Claims That Going To The Movies Counts As Exercise So now will you stop watching Disney+? Authors By Cedric Voets Published January 15, 2020
The Original Robin Says His Junk Was Too Big For 'Batman' Holy Bulge, Batman. Authors By Cedric Voets Published January 13, 2020
Ayyy, Our Bodies Are Getting Cooler By The Decade Ice in our veins. Authors By Cedric Voets Published January 10, 2020
'The Goop Lab' Nails The Science Of Scamming Wealthy Women More like witchcraft, really. Authors By Cedric Voets Published January 08, 2020
Can The 'A Quiet Place: Part II' Trailer Keep It Down Please Shhhh! Authors By Cedric Voets Published January 06, 2020
Bumble Unblocked Sharon Stone (But You Still Can't Date Her) Getting divorced dads' hopes up is just cruel. Authors By Cedric Voets Published January 03, 2020
6 Loopholes That Got Exploited With Zero Mercy Breaking rules: bureaucratic boogaloo Authors By Cedric Voets Published January 03, 2020
