Cracked Archive - Weird World

5 People Who Get Paid to Speak In Public (But Shouldn't)

If they sucked at any other aspect of their employment this much, they'd be fired or employed as a 100-percent organic artisanal vacuum cleaner.


6 Reckless Acts Of Child Endangerment By Action Heroes

These uncomfortable situations would normally prompt a call to the authorities in the real world.


Our Mistakes Kill You: 5 Lessons Of An ADT Alarm Technician

Something has always seemed a bit off with those ADT ads, so we talked to someone who worked behind the scenes at the company


6 Drug Busts That Went Embarrassingly Wrong

There's one thing no one has considered: Drugs might just be smarter than us.


4 Reasons A Termite Infestation Is Absolutely Terrifying

The problem is so similar to the way movies depict alien invasions that Steven Spielberg has bought the film rights to my infested door and the movie is coming out in the summer of 2017.


6 Insane Things You Learn When Your College Goes Bankrupt

Cracked talked to Kate Dobson to learn what happens when your school goes to that great NCAA division in the sky.


The 5 Actual Happiest Places On Earth

Cynicism is easy to come by when literally any combination of words punched into a search engine reveals twisted pornography and creative racism. But optimism takes work. And we decided to work.


7 Things You Learn As A Straight Guy Who's A Crossdresser

Hi there. I'm married to a woman and I have a kid. I'm Vera, and I'm a straight crossdresser


If Famous Pop Culture Had Been Made 20 Years Earlier

It's funny how much time actually influences your life.


5 Things You Learn After Getting Shingles

Yes, I had shingles, and, as I was about to find out, even though everyone has sorta heard of it and a third of Americans get it during their lifetime, most people don't really have a good handle on what shingles is.


The 6 Shittiest Ways People Have Woken Up From A Bender

Life could always be worse. You could have woken up as one of these poor bastards.


6 Propaganda Campaigns That Backfired Hilariously

However worthless your marketing degree feels, it could be much, much worse.


6 Real-Life Doctors Straight Out Of Horror Movies

We're here to tell you about the creeps who used the respectability granted to them by their diplomas and white coats (mostly the white coats) to do horrible things.


25 Terrifying Things Kids Suspect About Adulthood

Everyone grows up to realize what a friggin' idiot they once were.


5 Ways Atheists Argue Their Cause (That Aren't Helping)

I don't want to oversell myself, but I think that over the next two pages we're going to solve this problem forever.