Cracked Archive - News
So, How Are Terrorists Holding Up During This?
Evil in the time of corona.
- By Cedric Voets
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- July 31, 2020
35 Days Later, Officers Figure Out The Starbucks Thing Wasn't A Tampon
The Starbucks tampon mystery has been solved.
- By Dan Duddy
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- July 30, 2020
Are Billionaire Donations Really Worth Celebrating?
No one should be in a position to cavalierly give away 30 billion dollars because nobody should have 30 billion dollars.
- By Dan Duddy
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- July 30, 2020
5 Ways Crime Is Getting Weird During This
Everyone's had to make changes right now. Even law breakers.
- By Andrea Meno
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- July 30, 2020
'Umbrella Guy' Smashing Windows At George Floyd Protest Is Allegedly A White Supremacist
There are people who pretend to be a part of BLM, but are actually white supremacists. Unfortunately, not all of them can be identified by their umbrellas.
- By Dan Duddy
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- July 29, 2020
Uh, Maybe Don't Listen To The Demon Sperm Lady
Before conservative Americans start declaring themselves Immanuelsexuals, they might wanna look into what else she believes.
- By Amanda Mannen
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- July 29, 2020
Enough With Empty Social Media Challenges Already
We've fallen far from the halcyon days of the Ice Bucket Challenge.
- By Dan Duddy
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- July 29, 2020
Hey, Let's Ditch Black Friday This Year
It's about time Walmart and Target employees got off on Thanksgiving, but that's not nearly enough.
- By Dan Duddy
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- July 28, 2020
Local News Is Giving Time To COVID Conspiracy Theorists
And now, some complete bullshit.
- By Cedric Voets
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- July 24, 2020
Vegan Held A Bus Hostage To ... Promote A Joaquin Phoenix Documentary?
We did it, everyone: We found the worst vegan.
- By Amanda Mannen
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- July 23, 2020
A 'Wacky' MRA Lawsuit Guy Shot A Judge's Family; Maybe We Should Stop Indulging This
Maybe we should start taking them seriously?
- By Amanda Mannen
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- July 22, 2020
Is Sen. Kyrsten Sinema Trolling The GOP With Her Wigs?
This is the tan suit all over again, but on purpose.
- By Dan Duddy
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- July 22, 2020
5 Eerie Deaths That Have Unsatisfying Official Explanations
Sometimes, conspiracy theories aren't just all lizard people.
- By Ryan Menezes
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- July 21, 2020
The 5 Dumbest Conspiracy Theories (Being Spread Right Now)
QAnon, the dimmest bulbs to have ever taken on the Illuminati, are keeping busy.
- By Cedric Voets
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- July 20, 2020
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