We Want To Make Your Chest Look Real Nice

Look, we get it -- if there's one thing no one wants to think about in the middle of winter, it's ice cream. But if there were a second thing no one wants to think about in the middle of winter, it would undoubtedly be T-shirts. Well, tough titty, folks, we've recklessly hitched all our wagons to that second thing and now we're going to spend a minute every week reminding you that short-sleeve shirts go on existing even when you've moved on to polypropylene and flannel.

For those of you with the foresight to know that spring will come again, you will be handsomely rewarded, because we only have a limited supply of one of our favorite shirts, and it will be gone by the time people remember what sweltering heat feels like.

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We've got a countdown running in the Cracked Dispensary in case you're the type of person who likes to wait until the last minute before buying a women's extra-large just so you can say you got the last one.

Also, we'd like to point out that many of our shirts make excellent Christmas gifts for your loved ones, whether they be science fiction fans:

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American history buffs:

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Or a weird hybrid of the two:

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We've got shirts for all of them. But to ensure all orders arrive by Christmas Eve, you'll need to order by Monday, December 9. If you can't get it together by then, we're sure Target still has a whole wall full of scratchy, ill-fitting Female Body Inspector shirts available. Happy shopping.

Oh hey, speaking of shirts that aren't ours ...

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Our Weekly Dose of Envy

Each week we comb the Web to see what other designers are creating, and without fail, we find shirts we're mad we didn't think of first. Shirts that are funny, interesting, or downright cool, and it would be wrong of us not to share them with you.


Available at Spreadshirt


Available at Threadless


Available at Uneetee


Available at Amorphia Apparel


Available at FullBleed

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