Sure, their music was uninventive, their lyrics were unimportant, and they brought not one new or lasting idea to music with the entirety of their catalog, but they were a solid bar band. Just rock 'n' roll. "Don't hate us for playing to stadiums full of tone-deaf New Jerseyites, we're just a bar band that made good!" I will accept that defense, but it's also what makes this entry so unforgivable. Many years ago, I was apparently taking a break from my usual New Year's activity of having lots of hot sex with everyone, and I watched Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin' Eve like all cool people with too many dates.
And what a treat. Bon Jovi was covering "Helter Skelter" by the Beatles. A solid bar band covering one of the loudest songs by one of the greatest rock 'n' roll bands of all time. An institution. And they botched arguably the most famous lyric:
"You may be a lover, but you ain't no dancer" BECAME "You ain't no lover, but you ain't no dancer"
Wow. So whereas the Beatles were cheekily saying, "Honey, you may know how to f*ck, but you don't know how to dance," Bon Jovi is moronically saying "Baby, you're not a lover, oh, and also, you are deficient in dancing. So there are two things wrong with you, really. Both f*cking and dancing. On both counts I'd have to say you are sorely lacking. Also, I'm going to go ahead and use the "but" conjunction to combine these two similar things even though that makes no grammatical sense."