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People Make Weird Assumptions About The Intelligence Of Ugly People

According to most of pop culture, scientists are people with huge glasses, greasy hair, and unfashionable faces. You know, nerds. It's a trope a lot of people assume is true in the real world. That's why when a hot lady plays a scientist in a movie, people are quick to point out how "unrealistic" it is. Plus, look at real-life geniuses like Alfred "My hair looks like my skull is exploding" Einstein and Isaac "Sorry, my face just looks like this" Newton. Those were some fucky-looking dudes.

Researchers even did an experiment wherein they showed people photos of actual scientists and asked them to predict the competence of each. Subjects assumed the hotter scientists were worse at their jobs, I guess based on the assumption that they banged their way to the top of the astrophysics department. All of this is despite the fact that in reality, attractive people tend to be more intelligent.

In fact, teachers will actually put less effort into teaching kids they don't think have attractive qualities. We don't mean they find your kid attractive in a creepy way; just that if your kid has features that are generally considered unappealing, their teachers crank up not giving a shit to higher levels.

The best guess as to how all of this works is that the very ugliest among us have the highest variance in smarts -- they represent both the most and least intelligent. So if you see a guy in a lab coat with Einstein hair, you'll assume he's the most brilliant mind in the room. But run into that same person in the park, and you'll assume they're about to ask you for spare change. And to complicate things even further ...

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Really, Really Ugly People Tend To Make More Money

As I mentioned earlier, and as you already know from your own life, attractive people on average tend to be more successful, for a bunch of different reasons. Yet extremely unattractive people actually make the most money of everyone.

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Ugly Animals Get Studied Less Often

What, you thought it was only humans who suffered under this beauty-based caste system?

People who say they love animals usually love puppies and dugongs and whatnot -- stuff that looks cute, or at least friendly. But what happens to those animals that look like someone glued ears to a prolapsed asshole and put it in a tree, like the aye aye? Or the tooth-filled scrotum known as the naked mole rat? Those animals get screwed, in the most scientific of ways.

Ugly animals get the same treatment as ugly people: They're ignored and generally unloved. In terms of animal research and conservation, if you're not huge, ferocious, or cute as a button, you can go fuck a boot for all anyone cares. Even if the animal is endangered, if it has nothing going for it in a clickbaity sort of way, then you may as well kiss it goodbye. No one is making a video compilation of "adorable mussels reunited with their owners."

Australia, which straddles the fence between being overrun with adorable koalas and being overrun with terrifyingly gross everything else, is a great microcosm of this in action. Cute animals get the funding, ugly ones get bent. It's all about pandering to your audience, and if people need to support conservation efforts financially, they want to know their money is going toward saving adorable things.

That's right, animals: Natural selection isn't just about looking attractive to other members of your own species. It's about whether or not we want to nuzzle you.

Trying to kick the unattractiveness? Try starting with using a mirror.

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For more, check out 5 Scientific Reasons You're Better Off Being Unattractive and The Science Of Sexy: 5 Tips To Make Yourself More Attractive.

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