Don't get me wrong: in theory, public transport is a fine, green concept that I genuinely feel every city is morally obliged to develop and maintain. However, actually using it invariably gives me the fucking creeps.
Chris Turner/Stone/Getty Images
This is not an uncommon sentiment among my awkward acquaintances. Sometimes, the whole "stuff yourself in a metal box with other human sardines" thing is just too much, even if we're not talking about Tokyo-level jam-packs. It's all too easy to become discomforted in a closed space with a bunch of armpits, and sooner or later it's going to get to you. Travel long enough and eventually you start to shuffle awkwardly, maybe even mutter under your breath a little whenever someone pushes past you and accidentally kneecaps you with the clearly lead-filled duffel bag that they for whatever reason absolutely had to bring in the rush-hour subway. It makes you so mad, you could scream.
Wait, holy shit, did you just actually scream?
How to Deal With It:
Hey, you know what all that shuffling and visible discomfort and awkwardness makes you in the eyes of your fellow travelers?
Hint: it's this guy.