Not Driving Becomes A Part Of Your Identity
DAJ/amana images/Getty Images
Sometimes, I imagine an alternate universe me, cruising down the 101 like I'm in the opening credits of The O.C. I know the songs I want to play at full volume and the friends I would want riding shotgun. I can see this version of myself, and the prospect of meeting her in the future excites me.
But, when you've spent your whole life not driving, it becomes part of who you are. It informs your decisions and lifestyle. It sharpens certain skills and dulls others. I know exactly how much to purchase at the grocery store without my arms breaking, and I can converse with just about any stranger. I'll probably never need a gym membership again. I'll admit, I sometimes get immense pleasure from the idea that maybe I'll never, ever learn to drive. It's rare in America! A triumph in its own right. And after 29 years, it seems like a more accessible goal than the alternative.
I would rather spend money on gas-making burritos than gas-guzzling Toyotas.
Of course, accessible goals are not the stuff of dreams. It would be more meaningful to unpack the trust issues I have with myself and work toward getting on the road. It would be more exciting to pick up a friend from the airport. And, of course, it'd be more valuable to never hear the words, "So, when are you getting your license?" again.
Imagine how harsh the world would be if you needed a license to access the Internet? Adam Tod Brown thinks you should have to. Read why in 5 Everyday Activities That Should Require a License and, if you don't have a license, don't feel too bad. Driving is a hellscape populated by deranged ticket-dispensing police officers. See the worst of it in 6 Completely Legal Ways The Cops Can Screw You .
Subscribe to our YouTube channel to see what the worst drivers always do in How To Drive Like An a*****e, and watch other videos you won't see on the site!
Also, follow us on Facebook because if you're going to Facebook and drive, you might as well be Facebooking and driving with Cracked! (Please drive responsibly.)