According to a survey conducted by a sex toy manufacturer, 80 percent of people enjoy the use of dirty talk during sex. Of course, that's 80 percent of people who do surveys conducted by sex toy manufacturers, so we have to assume that, in the population at large, the number is somewhat lower. And that's where you need to be wary. If a certain percentage never use dirty talk, and then you can mark off other percentages of those who only use it sometimes, or some types, you're going to soon realize that there's probably only a niche population of people in the entire world who are OK with dirty talk that includes mention of things like colonic electro-stimulation or Adam West's torso.
Back in the day, I like to think the road to dirty talk was a lot like Frodo's journey with the Fellowship. At first there's only the far-off ominous threat of evil pursuing them and a handful of Ring Wraiths, and by the end it's Frodo climbing Mount Doom deep in the heart of Mordor while the rest of the Hobbits are facing off against a full-on Orc army. Adam West's torso is your Mordor, and you can't start your journey there. That's a place only giant eagles can rescue you from. You started in the dirty talk Shire saying classy shit like "I'm quite fond of the underside of your boobs, ma'am." And slowly, you and your purple-headed Samwise (you ladies have Pippin in a canoe) build up and up and a trust is established as your sexual rapport allows for it. So far, far down the road, when your sexual relationship has reached that point where you know how to fully and delightfully satisfy each other, you can really bust out the gems that would embarrass you in public should word of your filthy mouth ever get out.
George Doyle/Stockbyte/Getty Images