4

Sarah Holcomb Is ...

Pinto's Underage Girlfriend, Clorette DePasto, From Animal House ...

Animal House is one of the most celebrated comedies in the history of film, and with good reason: It's really, really funny. For those of you who don't know, it tells the story of Delta House, the rowdiest fraternity house at Faber College, as seen through the eyes of two new pledges, one of whom (Pinto, as played by young Tom Hulce) is kind of a sad sack, unlucky in love. How unlucky? Well, he scores a date with a cute local supermarket checkout girl, Clorette DePasto, having no idea that she is both 13 and the daughter of the town mayor.

Clorette DePasto was played by then 18-year-old Sarah Holcomb, and even in a movie filled with larger-than-life characters like Bluto (John Belushi) and D-Day (Bruce McGill), Holcomb finds a way to bring DePasto to life that has stayed with me a lifetime. This image sums that up nicely:

I don't have a good embeddable clip, but someone put all her scenes together (badly) here. Look at how hard she chews her gum, how every action is exaggerated. It's great, because at first it seems like we're just seeing an animated party girl, and it's only later that we learn these are the actions of an overzealous 13-year-old girl playing grown-up. I spent my life thinking this role was played by some ditzy mediocre Midwestern actress who never went on to another film, because why would she? She's just some chick, probably a lot like Clorette DePasto.

Well, I couldn't have been more wrong, because unbeknownst to me, I had seen her again in another classic role without ever realizing she was the same actress.

... But She's Also Danny Noonan's Girlfriend, Maggie O'Hooligan, from Caddyshack

That's right. Remember Caddyshack? Remember the 20 minutes that weren't about Bill Murray stealing the movie or Chevy Chase defining the articulate, cool-guy rebel in a way that would be aped in movie comedies for another 20 years? I'm talking about the love story between poor Danny Noonan and his Irish-born girlfriend, Maggie O'Hooligan. Seems Sarah Holcombe played her, too, and I had no idea, even though the only physical difference between the two characters is a haircut. You can critique how convincing or unconvincing her Irish accent is, but what you can't deny is that she inhabits the screen as an entirely different person. She holds herself differently. She moves differently. When I found out they were played by the same actress, I literally exclaimed "Holy shit" (which was really bad, because I was at a wake for a friend's dead mother, but still, it was shocking to me). Check out this scene:

3

Rory McCann Is ...

Michael "Yarp" Armstrong from Hot Fuzz ...

Rory McCann first got some notoriety in Simon Pegg's 2007 film Hot Fuzz, which contains one of the greatest one-word punchlines in the history of comedy:

Now, if you've never seen that movie before, that joke probably doesn't make a lot of sense, but the deal is, McCann plays Michael Armstrong -- the bad guy's henchman -- and all he says is "yarp." He's kind of special that way. A big lumbering murderous simpleton. And even though I've seen Hot Fuzz at least 10 times, I had no idea when I started watching Game of Thrones that my old friend was back.

... But He's Also Sandor "The Hound" Clegane from Game of Thrones

This one's a little different, considering McCann is portraying Sandor "The Hound" Clegane, who has facial scars, but I don't think that had anything to do with me not recognizing him. I mean, the scars are mostly on the side of his face and head. They do not drastically alter his appearance. I just think it's him. In the same way he can carry Michael Armstrong's mental deficiency, he can wear all of the Hound's pain and integrity. In a brutal show where hardly anyone is likeable or has any honor, he routinely stands up to bullying and brutality, even if he himself is brutal. Watch some Hound here, because embedding has been disabled. But if it hadn't, it would look like the image below, only it would move.

2

Michael Vale Is ...

Sam Breakstone of Breakstone's Cottage Cheese and Sour Cream

I don't expect many of you to remember this commercial. Even though it carried into the '80s, it's still a hazy childhood memory to me, but the Sam Breakstone commercials were a big deal. This successful ad campaign went on for years and years -- actor Michael Vale portrayed a demanding dairy chef who would not compromise his principles. Check out this one (also featuring a young Jeffrey Tambor a good 25 years before Arrested Development):

Or this one, when the ad campaign was still going 11 years later:

So that's Sam Breakstone: super pissed off all the time, and so insanely Jewish that they show this commercial to recovering neo-Nazis convicted of hate crimes to test their rehabilitation before parole.

1

Joe Turkel Is ...

Lloyd the Bartender from The Shining ...

Stanely Kubrick's 1980 film The Shining is one of the most famous horror movies of all time. Of all the freaky images in this classic, one stands out:

OK, fine, yes, the intimation of ghosts having gay BDSM furry sex is probably it, but second on the list would have to be ...