The 'Straight Pride Parade' Is A Party For Extremist Trolls

The 'Straight Pride Parade' Is A Party For Extremist Trolls

I'm sorry to break your hearts, folks, but it seems like the integrity of Boston's "Straight Pride March" that we all wanted to attend has been compromised. It turns out it's not the fun and innocent celebration of traditional power structures that we all wanted it to be, as it's being organized by right-wing extremists. Who would've thought that a celebration of straightness in this day and age would have sinister intentions?

One of its organizers has direct connections to the Proud Boys, a white nationalist group. Since these people aren't typically good with subtlety, they named Milo Yiannopoulos as the parade's grand marshal. If you don't know him, he's the kind of person news outlets suffering from a severe case of both-sidesism call a "provocateur" when they really mean "belligerent bigot douche."

PENTHOUSE nilo 111S s Yomi
Lisa Maree Williams / Stringer/Getty
If you're wondering why you haven't heard much from this dude lately, it's because his life is too busy falling apart.

You needed to be under some heavy delusions to think this event was anything other than fascist dorks throwing a fit that they aren't the marginalized group they wish they were. These people are not firmly tethered to reality. Case in point: They made Brad Pitt their mascot (until Pitt's reps told them to stop), as if one of the most handsome men alive represents the caliber of people who will attend. They think their parade is going to be a march of Tyler Durdens, when it reality it'll be a gooey mass of room-temperature bread dough slopping down the hot pavement, wearing polos tucked into cargo shorts.

Luis can be found on Twitter and Facebook. Check out his regular contributions to Macaulay Culkin's And listen for his "Meditation Minute" segments on the Bunny Ears podcast.

For more, check out Gwyneth Paltrow Launches Goop For Men, Yikes and Disney's Toy Story 4 Merchandise Will Haunt Your Dreams.

Also, we'd love to know more about you and your interesting lives, dear readers. If you spend your days doing cool stuff, drop us a line at iDoCoolStuff at Cracked dot com, and maybe we can share your story with the entire internet.

Follow us on Facebook. Because we love you.

Scroll down for the next article


Forgot Password?