7"Total Bastard Airlines" (David Spade)
Catchphrase lodged in America' brain: "BUH-bye!"
This one would have been much higher, if not for the fact that only two "Total Bastard Airlines" sketches were made. But this concept was so annoying, so manipulatively designed and so Spade-y, that it made the list.
The year was 1994, and America was growing tired of adding "NOT!" to the end of sarcastic utterances. "Total Bastard Airlines" sought to change this with Spade' spiteful stewardess character dismissing passengers with acidic remarks capped off with a "BUH-bye." These sketches were difficult to watch, not only for its repetitiveness, but also because it was awfully hard to hear Spade over the noise of factories churning out "BUH-bye!" T-shirts and bumper stickers, which we can only assume were burned when these sketches didn't take off.
There was no "BUH-bye" movie, and no "BUH-bye" amusement park. And, while the terminally uncool are still uttering lines from Wayne' World, it' nearly impossible to catch anyone still dismissing a hated friend or stranger with "BUH-bye." That' right, Spade actually came up with something so annoying, even the annoying people of the world had to step back and say, "No, that' taking it too far. Don't go there! SCHWING!"
6Cajun Man (Adam Sandler)
Catchphrase lodged in America' brain: "_____TION!" (imagine hilarious accent)
Adam Sandler' Cajun Man act consisted of forcing Kevin Nealon to ask him a series of set-up questions that would allow Sandler to reply with one-word answers in a cartoonish accent that no one would have recognized as Cajun, had the character not been called "Cajun Man."
We're thinking the Cajun Man character was probably invented during a commercial break. Like maybe somebody broke a crucial prop for the planned sketch and, in a panic, gave Sandler a funny hat and said, "We've got two minutes to kill! Now go out there and work your magic!" Plenty of classic Sandler characters have started this exact way: "Take this guitar and say something about Hanukkah;" "Here' a spoon and a plant. Say something about Halloween;" "Here' a wig and a cape. Sing something in Italian."
Unfortunately, not all of Sandler' spontaneous creations can be as brilliant and nuanced as the Hanukkah song, Opera Man or the Crazy-Spoon-Head Guy who wanted candy, and Cajun Man was one of Sandler' attempts that fell short.
Sorry, Adam. Put a spoon on that Cajun guy' hat and you've got yourself a three-picture deal.
5"Jarret' Room" (Jimmy Fallon)
Catchphrase lodged in America' brain: "( pot-induced snickering)"
The entertainment industry' best-kept secret is that Jimmy Fallon actually has some talent. If you take a look at his earlier work on SNL, he exhibited quite the range of impressions. Then it was realized Fallon could be the show' Tiger Beat poster boy, and that he was physically unable to keep a straight face on the air. Fallon was immediately thrust into "goof-around-and-giggle" roles, much to the frustration of cast members with any degree of professionalism. Therefore we get "Jarret' Room," a sketch designed for Fallon to goof around and giggle, making it as fun to watch as experimental eye surgery.
Set up as a parody of webcasts, "Jarret' Room" aspired to be a "Wayne' World" for the 21st Century, but it failed for one major reason: namely, Jimmy Fallon and Horatio Sanz not having a single sinew of the comic timing present in a Mike Myers/Dana Carvey pairing. Yes, that' right. Chuckle-buddy Horatio Sanz was in the "Jarret' Room" sketches, making each one an exercise in crack-ups and cue-card flubbery for both he and Fallon. And despite how funny they thought it was, it wasn't. We can only assume that Fallon' giggling ended after the reception of Taxi, his first feature film starring Queen Latifah and a talking car.
Note: We'd rather not see Taxi and continue assuming the car talked than find out for sure.
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