The 14 Greatest Jobs (That Can Never Exist)

Ninja, star fighter, rebel leader against an oppressive regime, the illest rapper alive -- we've all had dreams of being these at one point or the other.
The 14 Greatest Jobs (That Can Never Exist)

We all grow up hoping to achieve greatness in a totally awesome field of work. Ninja, star fighter, rebel leader against an oppressive regime, the illest rapper alive -- we've all had dreams of being these at one point or the other.

But what would life look like if these were jobs people would actually pay us to do? We asked our readers to show us just that and gave money to the winner. But first, the runners-up ...

Special Forces Antl-troll UMERNET POLICE CRACKED CONT
CRACKEDOOK THE REVENGE AND JUSTICE SUPERPAC VOTE AGAINST We don't care about the politics. We don't care about the parties. CON We care about elected
CRACKEDCON NOW HIRING Breathers WE'RE LOOKING FOR: PEOPLE WHO COULD BREATHE SALARY: .O0/INHALE I $250.00/EXHALE *REQUIREMENTS: MUST KNOW HOW TO BREATH
TETINGUISMI POMPOSITY GRAGKEDCON
The 14 Greatest Jobs (That Can Never Exist)
WANT A JOB WITH SWEET PAY? BE AN Ice Cream TESTER! NEVER BE BROKE HAAGEN! SALARY STARTS AT $100.00/LICK PRETTY SWEET DEAL HUH? APPLY NOWI DIABETES NSU
Professional SLAP Slappers Let us slap the STUPID right off of 'eml? CRACKED.COM
The 14 Greatest Jobs (That Can Never Exist)
CRACKEDCO WANTL 305 HI vol ELP CHEF Stros exp. ANTED Gre: skilis. Call trainer! of heart, Unicorn pure Mustb preferred. Wes females young, Great pay!
The 14 Greatest Jobs (That Can Never Exist)
CRACKED COMT
KING OF THE CATS
NINJAS ANTED Part time employee NG ADEPBINT 20-25/hr/wk INSIDE WE ST Apply PLEASE HIRINC ow CRACKED.COM
CRAGKEDCOM The wild blue yonder is getting wilder... BOLIC A Serve and Protect aees from your living room... as a DRONE COP

We are offering so many opportunities for you to win some dough that it'd be insane if you didn't get in on this. Aside from our photoplasties ($100 per contest) and GIF contest ($150), we are paying out 10 winners for our macro contests. And YES, you can win all 10 spots ($350 payout) if you've got the skills to blow our minds that many times.

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