You don't think of video games as having "deleted scenes," but stuff gets cut from games at the last minute, the same as with movies. The difference is that once a scene is cut from a movie, you'll never see it unless they choose to throw it onto a DVD. Cutting scenes from games isn't so easy, so the code is usually lurking around in there for you to find, if it's not sitting right out in the open in some early or foreign edition of the game. This can lead to bizarre discoveries in games we thought we knew well, like ...
6EarthBound Had a Naked Level
EarthBound is the gift that keeps on giving. We've talked before about how this cutesy-looking RPG for Super Nintendo is all about abortion, and how it murders the soul of whoever tries to pirate it, but there's one thing we haven't mentioned yet -- the hidden child nudity.
Americans would have given him a massive erection, twice the size of the rest of his body.
That's Ness, EarthBound's protagonist (who also appears in the Super Smash Bros. series), wearing his classic red hat and nothing else. This is from the Japanese version of the game, originally called Mother 2, and it's not some mistake with the colors where he's just supposed to be wearing a flesh-colored jumpsuit -- it's an area in the game known as Magicant, and whenever Ness goes there, his clothes instantly vanish. He just goes around showing his butt to everyone.
The U.S. version got around this by giving Ness some pajamas:
Notice how the voyeuristic rabbit quickly loses interest in the second scenario.
But why the hell would Japan do this in the first place, besides, you know, because it's Japan? Well, in both versions of the game, an old man explains to Ness that Magicant is actually a world he created inside his mind; apparently in Japan, nudity symbolizes purity, so Ness' soul self or whatever is always nude (even though all the other characters still have their clothes on).
There's something so unsettling about the shape of that snowman in this scene.
In the U.S., however, public nudity just symbolizes jail time, so they had to change the game.
5The Legend of Zelda Could Be Played by Screaming
Yes, there were enemies in the original Legend of Zelda that required you to scream them to death. The removal of this feature is the only reason an entire generation of NES consoles were not bashed to pieces by angry dads wielding claw hammers.
You can still see the remnants of this feature in the final game. The original 8-bit Legend of Zelda included one of the most misleading enemies ever, called Pols Voice. They were a pain in the ass, but they had one huge weakness, according to the game. It hints that they have huge ears, they have "voice" in their name, and even the instruction manual says they hate loud noises ...
If the monsters in the game really looked like that, this would be an 8-bit Silent Hill.
So what killed them? Arrows. Making Link create noises doesn't do shit. You could play that goddamn flute thing until your "B" button fell off, but those things would still ... do whatever it is they're supposed to be doing that kills you. Poison or something.
So what's the deal? As we've briefly mentioned before, the Japanese NES included a microphone built into the second controller. In that version of the game, Pols Voice were immune to arrows. Originally, to kill these enemies, you had to scream into that microphone, like an 8-bit version of a Skyrim dragon shout. In fact, one yell could wipe out a whole room of them, as demonstrated by this video:
Since no one else got those microphones, Nintendo had to drop the feature for international markets, and apparently didn't have time or didn't think of changing the instruction manual. You know, because those things were normally so accurate anyway.
And speaking of weird things cut from Zelda games ...