Allergies are your body's way of saying it hates you. About one in five of you are allergic to something, whether you know it or not. And while those of you who go into sneezing fits around cats or pollen may think you've got it bad, you have no idea.
Here are six allergies that would probably make you consider investing in one of those huge plastic bubbles.
Electrosensitivity (or the more impressive-sounding Electrical "HyperSensitivity") is the term used to describe this growing phenomenon. In essence, it's simply an allergic reaction to electricity or electromagnetic fields. You know, like the ones your entire body is sitting in right now.
Reports about sensitivity to electricity began with the introduction of computer monitors. People complained about a whole host of symptoms, and this was before the spread of wi-fi and cell phone towers (which release a related but more powerful type of electromagnetic energy than electrical wiring) made the whole thing much worse.
About three percent of people complain of electrosensitivity symptoms, though there is no reliable way to test for it so it's difficult to know how many of those people actually have the allergy and how many just like to bitch.
"What's it going to do to me?"
Let's see, we've got nausea, fatigue, headaches, sleeplessness, ringing in the ears, depression, difficulty remembering things and skin rashes. You name it, this allergy has it. Basically, it can inflict pain on every part of your body with the possible exception of your hair.
Probably best to avoid this thing
And while it's not listed as an official side effect, the most disorienting side effect may in fact be that it makes the Amish look like sane and reasonable people. Hell, Ted Kaczynski will probably start to make a lot of sense after your laptop gives you a third degree sunburn all over your groin.
"For the love of God, what do I do?"
Let's face it, if you think electromagnetic fields are hard to avoid now, come back in 20 years when everything from your kitchen table to your dog has a flat screen display built into it.
Your only real recourse is installing very expensive EMF filters in your home. There are companies that specialize in EMF protection, such as LessEMF who sell special electromagnetic field-repelling clothes. Their catalog does not make it clear if these are all reflective jump suits, so we'll go ahead and assume they are, and that 1960s science fiction was right about the future.
But more importantly, does any of it actually help? Well, that's where it starts to get weird.
The problem is, since the whole phenomenon is kind of new, we don't know much about it. And the long list of varied, seemingly unrelated symptoms have caused some researchers to assert that patients are, "Making shit up." In fact, some test subjects apparently showed symptoms even when there was no electrical fields around, or only when they thought there were.
You can tell the sufferers it's all in their head, but that's what they say about our fear of clowns and that doesn't magically make it go away.