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"We'll just fix that in post!" has always been the rallying cry for filmmakers in the middle of a troubled production. Unfortunately, sometimes things have a nasty habit of actually getting broken in post-production, usually thanks to studio interference. Victims include ... I Am Legend
The Way It Was Supposed To Be:
In the film's original ending, Neville is trapped as vampires break through his barricades and infiltrate his hideout (who would have guessed that locking yourself in an enclosed space in the middle of a city full of vampires would turn out to be a bad idea?). Then, this happens:
Yeah. In the original, the vampires are revealed to be thinking, benevolent creatures who were merely attempting to rescue a vampire that Neville had captured earlier.
Not only does the book end in a similar way, but it in fact was the entire freaking point of the book. That's where the title "I Am Legend" came from, Neville's realization at the end that the vampires were the good guys and that he was the monster of their legends, since he had been mindlessly driving stakes through their heart at every opportunity. Maybe a title like So I'm The Asshole would have been clearer.
The "Improved" Version:
This brings up the other problem, which is that all of the little hints that had been inserted along the way indicating the creatures had intelligence (the complex traps they set, the same creature reappearing in some kind of leadership role) are completely ignored. In the new ending, the vampires are mindless savages with no other purpose but general horror movie mayhem.
Perhaps the saddest thing about all this is that it shows that no one involved really believed in the message of the final product. They didn't produce a film in order to convey any kind message, they just strung together a bunch of cool scenes and called it a movie. One more reason why audience feedback isn't always the best guide, as anyone who has read YouTube comments will happily tell you.
Where you can find the original:
Superman II
The Way It Was Supposed To Be:
Most of Superman II was actually shot at the same time as the original, by Donner. Donner was more of the Christopher Nolan school of superhero movies, rather than the Joel Schumacher one, meaning he didn't see the need for a lot of goofball camp in his superhero movies. He even brought on his own writer on both films to smooth out the most retarded parts of the scripts.
This all worked great, except for the fact that the producers hated Donner's guts, though probably not as much as he hated theirs. He was booted off the project with 75 percent of the film shot.
The "Improved" Version:
For some reason, Lester thought it would be a good idea to splice slapstick comedy scenes that played like rejected America's Funniest Home Videos clips into the vicious superhero battle. So, when the bad guys unleash their super breath on the city, we are treated to a shot of an ice cream cone flying into a dude's face.
Is it unfair to say that everything that was good about Superman II was due to Donner, and that all of the goofy parts were Lester's fault? Let's put it this way: When Lester was finally given control of an entire film from the start, he gave the world Superman III.
Where you can find the original:
Unfortunately, because not all of the scenes were filmed, Donner was forced to cobble together old unused shots and test footage to fill in the gaps, and it's pretty noticeable at times.
Dawn of the Dead
The Way It Was Supposed To Be:
In the film's original climax, the main characters, realizing that they will never truly be safe, choose to commit suicide rather than join the legions of the walking dead. The film was to conclude with a haunting final shot of our heroine Fran shoving her head into her helicopter's propeller. This was of course an allegory for America's failing educational system. It also is the way that, in our opinion, most movies should end.
The "Improved" Version:
... then suddenly, Peter changes his mind for no reason at all and easily fights his way back to the helicopter, with heroic trumpets blaring in the background the entire time.
Apparently, the studio opted to go with the less depressing ending, in which our heroes are condemned to spend the rest of their lives in a post-apocalyptic wasteland dominated by murderous reanimated cadavers. The 2004 remake reveals a major plot hole in the film's revised closing sequence: Why did they fight their way through those zombies when the obvious solution would be to simply construct an indestructible tank and some make explosives out of everyday materials?
Where you can find the original:
Live Free or Die Hard
The Way It Was Supposed To Be:
The "Improved" Version:
The result? The new McClane was so tame that he couldn't even say his famous catchphrase. Blood splatters were digitally removed (and taking the blood out of a Die Hard movie is like taking the blood out of a vampire movie). We're predicting that by the time that Live Free or Die Even Harderer comes out, McClane will be fighting terrorists (or are they?) while armed solely with walkie-talkies.
Where you can find the original:
Yes, they still have the scene where a car flies into a helicopter and yes, the plot still makes no sense. But you'll be surprised at how adding the grit back in makes it feel so much more like a Die Hard movie. Blade Runner
The Way It Was Supposed To Be:
In the film's original bittersweet conclusion, Rick Deckard chooses to harbor a renegade android, even though she will soon face an electric sheepless sleep of death.
The original film also contains implications that the main character might himself be a replicant, a twist so creative and shocking that we can forgive it for not making any goddamned sense at all.
The "Improved" Version:
The narration also reveals that Deckard's robotic lover Rachael was not programmed to self-terminate, and they both got to live happily ever after until they both rode off into Heaven on a unicorn.
Where you can find the original:
Hell, at this point it'd almost be easier to read the damned book. If you liked that you'll probably enjoy our look at The 6 Worst Movies Hollywood Almost Made. And don't forget to check out Internet Party 2: An Intervention for MySpace to see which sites you shouldn't be inviting to your next intervention. Or head to the brand new Official Cracked.com Store and become a startlingly attractive walking advertisement for our site. |
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I'm amazed that "Brazil" is not on this list. What a shame.
Also, though it probably wouldn't make the cut, the original "My Bloody Valentine" was a fabulous slasher movie before it was edited to remove much of the gore, leaving behind a lukewarm thriller. That wasn't the fault of the makers, however.
What? I bought the final cut of blade runner for a fiver today. I know the pound is worth more than the dollar, but i think that £5 is worth considerably less than $80.
Let's not forget the lamentably butchered Puppet Masters. That is, if you can consider the last half of the movie "the ending". The first half is just like the novel and rocks. The second half.... yech. The whole ugly story can be found online but it involves incompetent producers and, IIRC, four different writing teams.
the mold they would have used for fran's head was actually used when wooley burst into one of the apartments and blew someones head off slomo it it
And if the comparison aren't enough proof, then compare Lester's version of Superman II with the Donner's Cut. That is SOLID proof that most of the goofiness was there because of Lester. So please, next time get your facts straight before making a fool out of yourself by accusing someone giving inaccurate information.
1) If Richard Lester is mostly responsible for the goofy humour in "Superman II", what explains all the idiot humour in the first film?
Have you seen Superman III or IV!?
Moreover, have you bothered to compare the goofiness of the first movie with that of the second?
YES, he is responsible for the goofy humour in II. Maybe YOU should get your facts straight.
"SUPERMAN 2 IS ONE OF THE BEST SEQUELS OF ALL TIME, EVEN BEFORE THE "RICHARD DONNAR CUT" WHICH ISNT EVEN THAT MUCH DIFFERENT."
...How old are you?
Superman II isn't that different because Donner wasn't able to continue the filming, so when making the uncut version, he was forced to use the scenes from his unfinished version of the movie (plus Lester's ones).
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If you read the Wikipedia article about the movie The Abyss, it says that the movie had a completely different ending tacked on and it would fit perfectly here, especially since you have the I Am Legend one here. Expand this list to 10 movies!
"like taking the blood out of a vampire movie"
In which case you have Twilight!
Ha ha ha, this was great.
Well, finally. I Am Legend actually makes sense to me now. The theatrical ending left me scratching my head wondering if they were running out of ideas, and grateful the Care Bears didn't show up too.
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lol dawn of the dead could be sooo much better jobe(sp?) the guy who did the makeup of it and first zombie was always sad about the ending so he made up for it every halloween scaring the s**t out of me..now he's in florida
Um, you're completely wrong about Dawn of the Dead. "The Studio" didn't change the ending--George Romero did. If you watch the commentary, he says that, with the comic-book feel that the movie started to take on, the original ending just wasn't right anymore. So, he changed it to reflect the unrealistic, Western-style direction he took the rest of the movie. In fact, the theatrical ending is so organic to Romero that he didn't even remember they'd begun filming another one, and for years denied that another ending had ever existed. Tom Savini, the special effects artist, had to show him the picture of the Gaylen Ross dummy for him to recall that the film's ending had drastically changed.
Live Free or Die Hard should be replaced with Snakes on a Plane. The PG-13 version wasn't as awesome as it could've been, but I wouldn't say it was "ruined" by any stretch.
The first movie version of the book was "The Last Man On Earth," starring Sir Vincent Price. The "vampires" in this bad ass 1960's film all cue up outside of Dr. Morgan's (price) house drunkenly suggesting that Morgan come out while gently rapping on his house with wooden planks and weak fists.
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After seeing I Am Legend, I was confused by the ending until my friends and I watched the alternate ending. The alternate ending was what I thought the movie was leading up to in the first place, and I was disappointed with the way they chose to end it. The alternate ending also gives the title an interesting twist.
HELL yeah I knew there was something fucked up about I Am Legend. I'm with you, NightmareAsylum. I was SO pissed at the ending and now I know why!
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Damn, Laurierennt, I'm from Brazil and I completely agree with you. I am offended by that movie... actualy, I could never watch the intire thing without passing out, droling, and waking up thinking "What the f**k was that?", just like a Taser victim. One of thesse days I'll take a capuccino overdose and finaly watch this damn thing! By the way, what was the favorite frase of McLane on Die Hard? I don't recall! And I don't think wikipedia has that info! ehehee