Watching the fluctuations in Vince Vaughn's sex appeal is like being a toddler watching the tides. You watch an entire ocean grow before your eyes and then watch all that water magically disappear! Where did it go??? And, here it comes again! After a while you realize it happens twice a day, shrug, and just take it for granted.
In 1996, Swingers introduced Vaughn as the smooth, fast-talking "T," who inspired a nation of assholes to tell each other, "You're so fucking money and you don't even know it."
Now, here he is four years later, looking like the Greek God of Hangovers.
Tabloids reacted with shock at first, but no matter how bloated and rundown he looked off set, he always managed to look decent enough by the time the cameras started rolling. For instance �
Vince, looking good again in 2001 ...
Vince in 2005 ...
Vince that same year ...
And then last year ...
And, so on. It's impressive if you think about it: He may never regain the aerodynamic physique he had in Swingers, but in a single year Vaughn can go from being handsome enough to make the cover of Men's Journal to looking like someone wrapped a dress shirt around a water bed, and back again.
4The Olsen Twins
In Sep 2003, Rolling Stone featured a cover story on the Olsen Twins, calling them "America's Favorite Fantasy." This was the cover shot:
While somewhat true, the full title should have been "America's Favorite Fantasy Even Though We Get Kinda Uncomfortable if We Think About It for Too Long." Remember, enjoying an Olsen Twin fantasy required one to simultaneously ignore the fact that they were a) seventeen, and b) sisters. (We usually managed by setting the scene in a utopian future with advanced cloning techniques and laissez faire attitudes towards the age of consent.)
Taboos aside, most American men were looking forward to June 13, 2004, the twins' 18th birthday, to be celebrated with hours of dirty jokes involving the Olsens and Doublemint Gum. The Olsen twins were always thin, but over the next several months Mary-Kate developed a hollow appearance as she struggled with an eating disorder and Ashley was attending NYU, where an upper-class liberal arts education left her with a vacant, waxy expression on her face.
America's Favorite pair of chopsticks. What makes it worse is that it's constantly forcing us into this awkward conversation:
"Man, look at the Olsen Twins now!"
"I know! Anorexia strikes again!"
"Yeah! They were so much hotter when..."
"When... you know."
"When they were children?"
"What? No! Not at all!
"Why don't you have a seat over here."